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Episode #192 – Finding Your Soulmate Relationship Using Human Design

Today, Nicole is sharing her own love story of how she met her husband, revealing how the principles of human design played a surprising role in her journey to finding her soulmate, even years before she had studied the system.

Nicole covers:

  • How following your strategy and authority can lead you to the right people, not just in love but in all aspects of life.
  • Why she doesn’t subscribe to traditional beliefs about pairing up based on energy types, sharing her unconventional yet powerful approach to relationships.
  • The dynamics of partnerships between different energy types

If you’re curious about human design, seeking love, or simply intrigued by the magic of soul connections, this episode is a must-listen. You will leave inspired and empowered to explore the depths of your own human design, ultimately leading you to meaningful connections and unshakeable love. Tune in now and discover the transformative potential of human design in the realm of relationships.

Links:

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Transcript

 Hello and welcome to Unshakeable with Human Design, everyone. I’m your host, Nicole Laino, and today we are going to be talking about teams. It’s one of the most challenging things that I hear from entrepreneurs all the time that they’re struggling with is how do I build a team?

How do I scale? How do I go beyond just me doing everything? Do I have to do everything myself? These are the complaints that I hear. If it’s going to be done right, does that mean I have to do it? Can I really rely on anyone to truly hold my vision? Why is it nobody can do things the way that I can do them?

These are like the common complaints that we hear from entrepreneurs, and really what it comes down to is a few key questions, a few key aspects of human design that can help clue you into how to solve these problems, and maybe how to not even create them in the first place.

Now I don’t hire by human design. I’m not like, instead of looking at resumes, I’m not looking at charts. That’s not what I do. However, they do come into account. I’m not throwing somebody out because they are not the right type necessarily, but I am looking at it, I am looking at type, I’m looking at many aspects of the chart, and I’ll talk to you about which ones are the most important and some of the issues that we deal with later on in the episode.

But I’m looking at specific things to see if they’re the right fit for the thing that I need. Steve Jobs said that great things in business are never done by one person. They’re done by a team of people. So, the first thing that entrepreneurs really need to get comfortable with is you cannot do it alone.

Because a lot of people when they’re complaining about their team, and you can go and listen to the interview I did with Veronica Romney recently, that was a few episodes ago, she’s the team whisperer, she has an amazing program called the Rainmaker Residency, if you want to hear more about the tactical aspects of building a team and specifically hiring a marketing leader for your team, which she calls a rainmaker, then please go listen to that episode.

There’s a lot of really amazing things in there. We’re going to talk about this from the energetic side and from looking at your business from a holistic standpoint, because a lot of entrepreneurs, you might know that you can’t do it alone, but actually the belief is I have to do it alone. And if you believe that you have to do it alone, you’re going to find fault with every single person who walks through the door.

You’re not really going to see them, you’re not really going to see the work that you’re giving them. That belief, just like the beliefs get in the way of the decisions that we make as far as how far we will push ourselves, the risks we are willing to take, how boldly we are willing to leap into the void as entrepreneurs.

We know that our beliefs matter there. But they really matter when it comes to the team, because those beliefs will seep into your relationship. It will color the way that you’re hiring. You won’t be able to see the true needs of your team if you have these beliefs in your head. So the first thing that human design can do is it can give you an objective perspective on what your business needs.

What do you need? Cause you might feel like you need everything. You might feel like you’re so overwhelmed, that you’re just so happy to have somebody to give work to that you’re not really looking at the work that you need to hand off, and you’re not really looking at what they would be good at, you’re just so happy to have a warm body and then when that warm body doesn’t measure up to this very high standard that you set for them that they don’t even know about a lot of times, you feel let down.

And then you go back to that belief of I got to do it all myself. So human design can give you this objective perspective of looking at your business by looking at your own chart, the team members that you already have, and then where are the holes. So this is what we’re going to be talking about in today’s episode.

We’re going to be going through this and how the chart can help you navigate team and all the things that come with team.

So before we get started, I do want to remind everybody that we have a new free guide available for you. If you are interested in starting a podcast, if you ever thought about starting a podcast, or if you have started a podcast but it is not monetizing and you don’t feel like it really feels sustainable and good to you, it’s not really working, then this guide will help you.

It’s called, it’s a Podcasting by Design Guide that we’ve created for you. And it’s a really cool guide. We go through the five different types and a sample structure of how you could structure your show based on your human design type. So if you’re interested in that, go to nicolelaino.me/podcastbydesign, all one word, and we will link all of that up in the show notes for you so you don’t have to remember it, but if you choose to, you can type that in right now and you can download that free guides completely free for you. And then please send me an Instagram DM or something and let me know what you think about that.

And certainly podcasting is something that’s changed my business. It’s changed the way my team has operated. It has streamlined so much for us. So if you’re interested in starting a podcast, I hope that you continue because I think it’s one of the best things that anyone can do for their business.

It’s all about how you structure it. So if you have ideas that like, I can’t have a podcast because I have X, we’re gonna show you how, it’s just about how you structure the podcast so it’s supportive to you rather than feeling like a drain and a strain on you. Okay? So check that out.

nicolelaino.me/podcastbydesign. You can also go to nicolelaino.me/podcastlinks, which is just another link that you can go to where you have all of the links of our free guides and everything that we have going on there, so you can always go to that page. It’s always the most up to date stuff that we have.

So let’s dive into this, right? Building a team by human design, let’s break down first of all, the five categories of the pains of building a team. The first question you need to be asking is where do you need the help?

And this is what I mean, if you have ideas about what you need, it might actually not be what you need. The chart can actually show you. The pieces in your business that are missing energetically and productivity wise. You can actually see this in the human design chart and there’s a few things that we look at.

We look at something called penta energy. This is for teams where we get into a small group. So three or more. If it’s just you and somebody else, we’re really going to be looking at the energetic dynamic between the two of you. What do you bring to the table and what are the key pieces that are missing from business energy for you?

What are the key pieces that you don’t naturally have? And it’s not that you don’t have it. You’re just not going to be consistent with it, so maybe you want to bring somebody in who has these traits, but also if they have it in their chart, it’s going to be really easy for them. A lot of times what I’m looking for in a chart is I want to make sure that I’m not hiring somebody who says they have a trait, and it’s really a shadow state for them.

That it’s something that they are not really meant to do, but they’ve pushed themselves to do. And something usually energetically feels off when I’m talking to them or when I’m working with them that it’s like, this just doesn’t feel natural to them. And if you look at the chart it’s a lot of times it’s something that they are pushing out of that’s not really natural for them.

We don’t want to do that. We don’t want to condition people, and we don’t want to promote the conditioning of people. Because ultimately it’s not going to work for you, it’s not going to work for them, and there might just be either a better place for them on the team, or a better opportunity for them outside of your group.

So, where do you need the help is the first question. Where do I really need the help? Where is it that my business needs support? And then, who is the next question. Who is the best fit to suit those needs? Who is the best fit to fill that void that we have? Now, if you’re not looking at somebody’s chart, if you don’t feel comfortable asking for their human design chart, these are the traits that you’re asking people, you’re making sure that you’re crafting questions and you’re structuring the interview that you have with them, and the description of the job when you create it is going to be made from a place of really honing in on these key pieces. So if direction is one of them, you really need an implementer who can be a self starter who has leadership capability.

It really depends on what it is that you’re looking for. Not everybody is going to have all of the energy that you need. It’s not going to be, I’m going to put every single thing that I need into this one job description. No, you have to look at it and see, are some of these better suited for a secondary person?

Am I getting the most out of the person that I hire by asking them to do everything? Or would this be better suited if this were one person and then another person came in to fill these pieces? But you can start looking at it differently where you’re figuring out high level, who do I need? Now, do I need somebody who’s going to be producing work product constantly?

Then I might be looking for somebody who is more of a generator, a manifesting generator. I want a sacral in that role, most likely. I don’t want a conditioned projector if I know that I’m going to need them a lot of hours.

Me as a manifesting generator, I do a lot of work. I do a lot myself. I do need direction and somebody to hone me in on how to be more efficient. So a projector who is an energy projector might be a good fit for me as long as I’m not looking for them to implement everything themselves. As long as I’m not expecting them to work eight hours a day churning out stuff for me.

It would be for very specific, specialized tasks that I’m recognizing them for and I’m giving to them. So this is how you can start to look at, who am I looking for? It’s not going to be one specific thing necessarily, but it’s going to be, it could be this, it could be that, it could be this. I’m looking for this type of person.

I’m looking for this type of energy. I know I need this. Like I said, me as a manifesting generator, I benefit from projectors being around because manifesting generators, we move fast, sometimes so fast that we’re not thinking, that we’re just like, next thing, let’s go, let’s go, let’s go. Does it benefit my business to have a guide, to have someone who sits at the top with the bird’s eye view, looking at everything that we’re doing deep into the processes and saying, I see how we could do this in about half the amount of steps that we are doing it now.

I see how we could build this far more efficiently. Could my business benefit from that? Yes. Is that maybe more of a consultant than a full time team member? Potentially. I could also have a coach who is a projector who is guiding me on specific things. So these are all the different ways that I can look at it.

Doesn’t all have to be full time team members. These can be ways that I’m looking to balance my own energy. Look at the pieces that I don’t naturally have and how can I make myself better. All of that can be found in my chart. I don’t even need anybody else’s. I just know what I’m looking for now. And then the next question is how do you find these people?

How do you find the people that fit and fill the voids in your business? Well, strategy and authority will bring the right people to you at the right times. So that’s always at the core of everything. Is following your gut, following the invitation, knowing where you want to go.

Having a vision if you’re a manifestor, holding all of that, and then allowing the right people to come in. There’s also, if you are a four line, you’re probably going to be asking people for referrals, for friends. You’re going to go to your network. Your design can always be informing how you find the people that you need.

I have a split definition. If I’m not getting in the way, I will find people to bridge my splits. They come to me. I am a magnet for those people. I also have a lot of splits. So I’m always magnetizing people. But when I’m looking for somebody in particular, when I’m looking to fill a role, I just get very, very clear about what I’m looking for and you can use the term manifesting, but I’m really thinking about who would be perfect here.

They would make this part easier for me. And again it does not have to be a full time team member, sometimes it’s a coach, sometimes it’s a mentor. I did this with my 8th gate. I had issues with promoting myself. I can do it in some ways. There were other ways that I did not feel comfortable.

I felt like I needed support. I needed the right support. And it’s not the exact gate necessarily that I need, it’s just someone that’s going to help me in that way, that’s going to help me promote myself in a very specific way, who’s going to help me be more visible in a way that doesn’t feel like I’m pouring energy into my shadow.

That was how I found my last mentor, Rebecca, I found her through response, that was through a series of responses, showed up in an event, she made an offer, I felt so connected to it, I felt so connected to her, I was like, this is what I’ve been asking for, and then I was able to sit with it, sit with my authority, and then ended up joining her mastermind, that can be how it happens. But again, we can be using our feelers, we can be using other aspects of our design to find these people.

But then once you find the people, there’s the questions that remain of how do you build a culture? And then how do you manage people so that they can reach their A player potential? Because that is what you have to realize is that everybody has A player potential for someone. Do they have a player potential for you?

And that’s really going to come down to the way that you manage them. There are so many aspects of this, but I really want to hone in on this one for this episode. And this is about the way that you manage people. The hiring and how you’re looking for the correct voids in your business.

Like I said, if you have a small team. Then you’re going to be looking at penta energy, which is a whole other energetic dynamic of teams of three or more people until you get to the larger organizations. But these small groups, these small containers, these small businesses, a lot of them are going to have penta energy. There’s going to be a way that certain people’s energy takes over naturally.

So you’re going to want to focus on that stuff. And that’s the stuff that I do when I work with teams and they want to know how to work better together. First of all, we’re looking at what’s the energy that’s missing, and then we’re looking at exactly what people are good at.

Where do they belong? What’s the position that they belong in? Now what that does is that helps them elevate themselves into that a-player potential. How they get to actually be the A player and not just be the potential a player is that you’re recognizing them and you’re helping them do something that’s a gift of theirs.

This is how people become fulfilled. We all feel fulfilled when we’re using our gifts. It’s when we feel like we’re living our purpose. It’s when we feel like life is fun. Work is fun, and when you give somebody a venue to exercise and exhibit their gift, use their talents, and you give them space to grow into them, that’s when people are truly grateful and they would never go work someplace else.

But there has to be a way of you managing them where you’re fostering that type of environment, where you’re fostering that level of communication, where there isn’t the passive aggressive communication standards that we see with a lot of, with a lot of management teams and a lot of team dynamics, which is that people don’t really talk about what’s going on.

Understanding energetically how you affect the people on your team is, honestly I think that it’s irresponsible to not know it. To not know how somebody might feel dwarfed by your energy in some ways. Where you’re going to be the dominant force, and how you are making sure, if you have somebody on your team who has an open throat center, but they have so many other things, like you’ve got a generator who’s a total work horse, but they have an open throat, and you’re not giving them the opportunity where you’re asking them for their opinion, you’re giving them the opening and meetings to speak, you’re going to take somebody’s potential and you’re not going to give them the ability to put it out there.

They’re going to be unhappy. They’re going to feel unheard. And that’s one of the most painful things for people with an open throat, is that they can feel like they aren’t heard. They can feel invisible. They can feel like nobody ever gives them any attention. So you can make them feel incredibly powerful and loved and supported if you just give them that opportunity. If you just recognize them, if you just kick the door open for them and say, I would love to hear what you think about this. It’s time for you to share. And making sure they have that opportunity. They will be grateful. They will feel like they are honored for who they are.

And not just what you need from them. Which is the shift that we need to see with teams. It has to be more than just like you work for me, get the work done and then go. It’s how can I honor you because I can’t be successful by myself. So can I look around at the team around me and say we’re in this together, I value you, and the better you are the better we are.

And the better we are the more successful my business is. It’s so important to honor the people who are helping you get to the top. And the last thing is, it helps you understand what your people’s love language is. What’s their love language?

So this is part of how you get the most out of your people, is there is a specific code that we all have. Now you’re of course going to be finding their strengths. You’re of course going to be seeing that they’re stepping into their strengths. That they’re not leaning into the shadow of something that could be a beautiful powerful specialization for them.

You’re going to need them to do it their way. Of course you are. You don’t want someone who’s meant to work alone to feel like they have to do everything with the group. All of these things are about honoring who they are and getting the most out of them because they feel like, wow, this, I couldn’t have a more supportive environment than this to work in.

But the love language is about finding those things plus, what do these people need? Do projectors need recognition and praise and to be recognized in order for their gifts to come through? Yeah. So by understanding their design, you get to see a way to get the most out of them. How do you communicate with them?

How do you make them feel appreciated? You recognize them. You recognize a projector.

A manifester. You ask them to help with the vision. What do they see? What is the way forward? All of these ways are going to excite them. You are going to light them up. And you can see how all the pieces start to fit together. You can see how you can bring them on to your team for specific things.

Do you need an implementer? Do you need somebody to lead a team that’s going to be a very different person than a pure implementer? Do you need somebody to just help on very specific projects to take care of one specific thing? You’re not going to want somebody who’s multi passionate. You’re going to want somebody who’s not going to get bored with doing the same thing over and over again and getting really great at it and getting really into it and becoming a master of that one thing.

You want them to be focused. You don’t want somebody who needs to rest all the time and who wants to just find efficient ways of doing things to be your pure implementer who’s doing all the stuff for you and you need them to be running a mile a minute alongside of you. It’s so important.

And it’s not about discriminating against people that they won’t be good at something. It’s about honoring who they are. So you’re not driving them into the ground, trying to make them who you want them to be. And conditioning them, and making them feel not only not seen, but like they have to please you. Or like they can’t get out of the relationship with you, they can’t get out of this.

And they’re unhappy, and they’re unfulfilled, and you’re actually contributing to that, rather than helping. And that creates an energetic dynamic between the two of you. That is not healthy and it permeates and seeps into every aspect of the team.

So I hope you found this helpful. I hope that you liked this episode, that you got a little peek into how we start to look at like business energy, the business circuitry inside.

There’s specific circuitry that we look at for human design and business, that Penta energy, and just the ways that those key questions on building your team and scaling your team can be answered through the lens of human design and through the human design chart. I hope that this helped you with that.

I hope this gave you clarity for that, and I hope that you join us next time. Remember, if you want to have an unshakeable business, you must first become an unshakeable human. So, I hope that this helped you get there and I hope that you join us next time where we can help continue the journey on you becoming Unshakeable with Human Design.

We’ll see you then.  

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