Nicole Laino
Hello, and welcome to the limitless entrepreneur Podcast. I’m Nicole Laino, your host, and I am here with a very special guest. I’m here with Erica Diaz Castro. She’s the host of true to your core podcast, CEO of Castro strong LLC, and she’s a coach for women leaders. Eric, I’m so happy to have you here.

Erika Diaz-Castro
Me too. Thank you for having me. I’m really excited.

Nicole Laino
Yeah, thank you for being here. So why don’t you tell our listeners a little bit about you? And then I’d love to ask, tell, tell them a little bit about you. And then who inspires you and why?

Erika Diaz-Castro
Okay, so I’ll give you the Cliff Notes version, because I can get a little verbose when I like, try to dive into things because everything is important to me. But I am a life coach for women leaders, I started in the fitness industry and kind of graduated from that space into life coaching, because I saw that the root of a lot of the issues My clients were coming to me with were actually much deeper than fitness or food or moving their body. So with that said, I moved into life coaching and I have been in the coaching space since 2012. So a while but my company’s only existed for a couple years. So now I am working solely with women, I do have a couple of women who are in the entrepreneurial space that I work with, but a lot of the women I work with are in the corporate space and considering moving over into entrepreneurship, so kind of trying to find their their flow.

Nicole Laino
That’s great. I think that that like kind of encapsulates a lot of our audience too. But tell me who inspires you and why like, I love to kick it off like that.

Erika Diaz-Castro
Okay, so I feel like the cliche answer is my mom. She did a lot on her own. And my dad, who my dad had a fourth grade, I think fourth grade or sixth grade education. And he just like worked in the fields in Puerto Rico for the rest of his time until he came to the US. And my mom was the only girl of nine children. And like, went against the grain and left her home city and state to go to college. And like really make her dreams come true. And a lot of her raising us was on her own because my dad worked nights. And then my dad was also not really into like extracurriculars. So she kept us busy so that we wouldn’t be in trouble. Because we grew up in a pretty urban environment that had a lot of gang activity and drugs and stuff like that. So she made sure that even if it costs her sleep, she had us, you know, in all the activities and sent us to the best schools.

Nicole Laino
She had a vision for her. Yeah,

Erika Diaz-Castro
She sure did. And only she could see it, because I think my dad would sometimes fight with her because he didn’t see it. And he’d tell her, why are you spending all this time? Like, what are you doing there? They’re just kids, right? Because he grew up my dad is one of 12. And they grew up very poor with, you know, basic needs. And my mom was going above and beyond to create a very different life for us. So I’m forever indebted to her.

Nicole Laino
I love that. And I love it for so many reasons. But I think that that sort of as a unexpectedly great segue into what we’re going to talk about, you know, you already kind of touched on some things that I want to talk about. But I love that your mom sort of signifies a lot of I think it’s why the coaching industry is so big right now, I think that’s why people listen to these podcasts, everybody’s looking for somebody to believe in them, and believe that they can be more. And when you can look past the moment that you’re in to see a moment to four. And if you can look 10 2050 paces out, then you can really make magic happen. And your mom showed that to you. And that’s amazing. What a gift.

Erika Diaz-Castro
What a gift for reo. And I learned by watching not by listening. So seeing her execute on a lot of the things that she didn’t really say but she did was transformational for me.

Nicole Laino
Yeah, but leading by example. There’s just nothing, there’s nothing better than that. There’s nothing that’ll get your results and something in you like somebody leading by example right in front of you. So the other thing that you touched on in here is in your background that you you know that you were in the fitness space, the health and wellness space, and that you realize that people came to you for issues that actually went deeper than what they thought so I’m guessing like weight loss and it’s actually connected to something else and that kind of led you to life coach thing. And I think that sort of I something that I’d love to talk to you about, since that’s kind of just a huge part of your story is, I think a lot of people hear from a lot of people that they’re not where they should be, or they’re not where they want to be. And they don’t know why you hear that I feel stuck. I feel some people feel paralyzed in the spot that they’re in. And they think, and that’s sort of like the the inspiration for this podcast was that it’s not the tactical stuff that you need, because you think like, I need an Instagram hack. That’s usually where you go with it. I need an Instagram hack. I need this strategy, I need this thing. But very rarely is it that thing that you actually need? It’s something else. Okay, so. So why are people not where they think that they should be? What’s the real reason?

Erika Diaz-Castro
Yeah, I think there’s a disconnect, honestly, between who we say we are and who we are showing up as. And that comes down to living in our minds or the story, we’re telling ourselves being based on our intentions versus being based on our actions. And I think being intentional is important. But there has to be an action that’s attached to it, that actually validates the intention. So with that said, a lot of the women I’ve worked with, and it started back in the weight loss time, were saying that something was a priority for them. And when it came down to what they were doing every day, it actually didn’t make the top five things or even the top 10 sometimes, because we’re pulled in so many directions. And there was always a reason that they could give themselves to justify why that thing didn’t make it into their top, whatever that day. And I mean, let’s be honest, we’re working with really smart women, women who are capable of doing so much, but when you are in the moment of being pulled in different directions, and you are in that space of focusing on just the thing in front of you, it’s easy to lose sight of the bigger picture, and kind of come back to who you are intending to be. So I think there, again, is a disconnect between who we think we are and who we’re actually showing up as. And it’s not because we want to be misleading, or because we aren’t living in, you know, on purpose with without integrity, but we sometimes are just kind of sucked into the everyday things that seem really big, but in the grand scheme of things are just really small opportunities for us to make a different decision.

Nicole Laino
No, I that. That certainly, I think is the core of everything really, like, whenever I feel like I’m not achieving or I’m not or I’m working with a client, something’s not working, you can usually come back to Okay, well, what’s our priority hierarchy here? What are we? What are we putting first? And of course, we have things like family and stuff that, and this is a discussion I had recently with my clients where, you know, everybody says family first. Yeah. And family should come first. But I think there’s also shame, with ever feeling like anything else comes first. And I think this is very exclusive to women. I don’t think men have this same feeling of I don’t think they have the same attachment or shame with not putting family like so far ahead.

Erika Diaz-Castro
Yeah, I think because the role that a lot of men see themselves playing is the role of the provider. So if they are fulfilling that role, they are taking care of their family and putting their family first, and they understand it comes with a sacrifice. Whereas women, we are now not just homemakers and nurturers but we also are co providing for our families and taking on that additional role. While not sometimes dispersing the responsibility of raising your family and taking care of the house just adds on to the pile of things that you have to do. It’s like the never ending to do list. And you can very easily guilt yourself into thinking that you’re not doing a good job when you’re doing everything you possibly could have otherwise you’ve done something different.

Nicole Laino
Yeah, and cutting yourself a little bit of slack there can go a long, long way in freeing you up to do everything. So this this is I think part of So in your experience is that what causes a lot of the gridlock?

Erika Diaz-Castro
Yeah, there’s the a lot of the women I work with her on coasts, so like the East Coast, the West ESCOs are in like bigger cities where you have to commute to work. So they’re working, you have to kind of factor in your commute, which is time. And then they’re all the things that they want to do outside of that, but your energy is sucked up by work, by the commute, by the interactions you’re having with people in your life. Very ambitious women, many times have a lot more tension in relationships, because people don’t understand their ambition. And that lack of understanding or that lack of compassion from other people sometimes is a heavier load to carry at the same time that you’re working through a lot of your already stressful situations with and so there’s just like this complex layer after layer after layer. And then you have to think about your family. So it doesn’t really end if you don’t intentionally face some of these things and priorities. Boundaries are really important. And actually following through on the things you are committing to what your intentions are, you know, following through on that with action.

Nicole Laino
And I’m curious what you think of this, like when I hear priorities, boundaries, carrying through, like, immediately, it kind of my mind just goes to, you’re always letting somebody down with one of these. And there’s like that balancing act. And, you know, how do they reconcile? So if someone’s listening to this on the podcast now, like, yeah, that’s me. Like, I feel like I’m, I’m, I’m trying to be all the things I’m trying to be number one at all of these things. And that’s impossible. Yeah. So. So what I keep thinking of is that normally, we’re the ones that go in the backseat, that, you know, we’re putting everybody else first because we think that that’s the right thing to do. We put ourselves in the back seat, but then we are kind of passive aggressively, sort of like, just that part of us is screaming out.

Erika Diaz-Castro
Yeah.

Nicole Laino
feel resentful?

Erika Diaz-Castro
Yeah.

Nicole Laino
Yeah. What do you walk people through? Who would be in that situation? Like, how do you reconcile the priorities, the family setting boundaries, and actually carrying through on the things that you you set for yourself?

Erika Diaz-Castro
That is a process I walk, really any woman working with me through and it starts with just recognizing your purpose and knowing that your purpose is not to make other people happy? There is a specific reason you’re on this earth and how your call to serve that purpose will change. So having that awareness of how you’re called to do the thing right now, so if your purpose is to help people, how can you help people right now, that will align with the priorities that you state our priorities. And when you are doing that digging, and coming to that place of kind of acceptance, you will, you will essentially, look at what you have to sacrifice to have the impact you’re meant to have and to play the role you’re meant to have. But there is this piece that you should have when you’re when you’re working through that. And if you don’t have peace about it, I think that’s a really big indicator that you might be lacking awareness somewhere before you got to that to that part of figuring out your priorities and figuring out what you’re going to be sacrificing during that time. So I’ll give you an example. If my mom is my biggest inspiration, she always felt like her purpose was to help people. How she did that for a really long time was through teaching. She was a teacher and the public school system for 33 years. And for 33 years, she did that the best she could and raised us the good thing is that we’re about the age of the kids she was teaching so we could kind of tag along for a lot of our stuff and it kind of worked out. But she didn’t take on additional projects. She didn’t wear any more hats and she really had to unless there was an urgent emergency that came up. And when that chapter closed, she moved on to serve her family in a different and much more in depth capacity. So she knew that while her teaching career was her, one of her top priorities, she would sacrifice, maybe time with friends, travel all those things. But when she retired and she started to help her family more, she knew that she had a little more bandwidth to do other things that maybe aligned with how she was called to serve that purpose in that new space. So I think, with that example, it just illustrates that sometimes we’re living too far in the future, and we’re not focused on now. And we want to wear all the hats that are on our heart, do all the things that we dream of at the same time and not allow them each to exist in their own respective season.

Nicole Laino
Yeah, wow. Because it’s almost like, and I do this, and I think about this when I work with my clients, too, when we’re in one of these spaces, and I think you’re just you’re putting it really beautifully about how you’re breaking this down. But what I always look at is, you know, it’s, there are lots of right things that you can do, there are lots of right strategies there are, and that’s what you’re talking about, about, like, you know, there’s there’s all the hats you could wear, but which is the hat that you are going to wear today, like you might have a closet full of great outfits. Yeah, but you can’t wear them all at once. You have to be a certain, you know, this is my look for today. And but you want to have that be strategic. So always looking at kind of project managing yourself. It’s the same thing as like, when I worked on I have a software company. And when we built the software, it was like, in the beginning, we tried to do everything at once. And you know what happened, nothing got done. It did not feel fulfilling, nothing was accomplished, or lots of things were halfway done and never got finished. And then it was like no, no, no. Okay, here’s the list. Here’s the everything that we want to do. Now, here’s the things that we’re going to say are the top priorities of those top priorities. What are we going to do in this 30 Day sprint that we’re in for the next 30 days? What are we going to focus on? We’re gonna focus on this, okay, now, what are the tasks that support these specific things? And breaking it down like that, when you can start doing that, then that tells you exactly what you should be doing? Sometimes we look too much at the macro.

Erika Diaz-Castro
Oh, yeah. It’s just so overwhelming. It’s it’s having the bigger picture in mind is important, because you know that that’s where you’re working toward, but having tangible milestones that you can reach and celebrate. And like pause to celebrate is so crucial for the longevity of your of your journey. And one of the things that I talk about, in just my personal relationships and conversations is endurance. And I’m so I came from the fitness world, and most of my friends who I’m very close with my husband included, our competitive athletes. So a lot of our references or a lot of the way we kind of explain things to each other has to do with, like workout terminology. So endurance is crucial, because you don’t start the race at like a sprinters pace. If you’re running a marathon, then you’re going to be taking things very gradually. You see sometimes marathoners, taking like a quick break, whether it’s, you know, five seconds for water or a quick bathroom break, assuming they’re not running it into hours. But you see them taking that and then getting back on the horse and then continuing that pace, right. So if you know that each mile is just one leg of that race up dilutes you if, if you know that each mile is just another leg of that really long race, then you know that you have to really focus on that mile and what that mile is going to bring you which is consistency, right? And it’s going to lead you to the next mile. If you keep going, you’re gonna get to the next to the next milestone. And whether you celebrate for just a couple of minutes or you take you know, a full season to celebrate is up to you. But knowing that there’s going to be another season to do that other thing is super crucial to the long term journey. And that’s for motherhood that’s for business that’s for any relationship or endeavor that you are diving into, especially if you’re kind of managing those two sides at the same time.

Nicole Laino
Yeah, and I think that that absolutely. And I think that that’s where having the having a vision and having that end goal. You need that so you know how much more gas you need in the tank while you refill for one the next milestone, otherwise you’re just doing things and that’s how you know sometimes we can be too vision focused. Where are we losing? We’re losing those my Grow milestones to get to so we’re, you have this big vision, but you’re like, I don’t know what to do. And that leaves you feeling very scattered and unproductive. But then sometimes we’re so focused on those minor things that we’re not focused on, well, where are these things leading us? Are they leading to a place that we want to end up at? And then like you’re talking about building the endurance, the endurance is, there was a my, my community manager put up in our Facebook group the other day, are you a great starter? Or are you a great finisher? almost everybody’s a starter. And I think most people are like, we get excited about things, we do things and then you burn out or you lose vision and forget that there’s still another 10 miles left in this race.

Erika Diaz-Castro
Yeah, yeah, shiny Penny syndrome, new beginnings are so addicting. And it’s like, why not start something new that you get this like, huge adrenaline rush, and there’s so much hope, because you haven’t yet gone through the things that you’ll go through. And that is something that I think even I, as a younger person struggled with, because it was, you know, it takes dedication and discipline, and commitment to follow through on things that require time, ultimately, and consistency in in the effort you’re putting in. So I hope to always be a strong finisher, by if I’m being honest, I do need that extra support to ensure that I am getting to the next phase of the race so that I can finish. And sometimes that looks like a coach, sometimes that looks like a friend sometimes that looks like confiding in my husband. But there’s, you know, there’s a lot of different ways we get pulled. And we have to be really aware of what we need so that we can ask for the right support, and make sure that that support actually contributes to what we’re trying to prioritize and accomplish.

Nicole Laino
And so what would what would your advice be to someone who is in one of these stages, who is in one of those spaces where they feel like they’re not where they should be? They don’t know how to prioritize, they don’t know, how can they be more intentional and align their actions with intentions,

Erika Diaz-Castro
I think you have to get really clear on your purpose first, and get really clear on how you’re called to serve that purpose in the next 3060 90 days. And as that clarity comes to, you start to really hone in on what you are willing to release or let go of, so that you can create space for the things that are important to you. And that’s a three step method, I call the arc method. So you assess you released and then you create. And the creating part is super fun. The hardest part is the releasing part. Because you have to actually identify, what do I let go of right now? Maybe not forever. But what is not going to help me right now in this next 3060 90 Day sprint to get to the part where I get to create something that is aligned with that purpose. And with the season I’m I’m I’m called to serve that purpose in and what’s

Nicole Laino
an example of something that you have to release you have to let go of in order to create.

Erika Diaz-Castro
I’ll give you like a really easy but difficult example for some people. My favorite topic is a morning routine topic. Because so many people talk about the importance of a morning routine, but not a lot of people have it like down packed you know what I mean? So when I talk about morning routines with people, I asked them, What is your ideal morning routine look like? Right? And a lot of times it’s at least an hour of like being without having to answer emails and you know, do things just being so that you get your energy, right, you set intentions for the day and you have a vision for the day. The reason that doesn’t happen for a lot of people is because they don’t rest enough. And if you don’t rest enough, you’re not going to wake up at the time you need to to have this hour that you need. So sometimes doing less and determining what less actually should be is the biggest thing so releasing all of those to do lists throughout the day. All of the things that look like they’re really important but actually don’t push you further they just keep you busy. Is the heart hardest part because especially if you’re an entrepreneur, you like a solopreneur, especially you were doing everything right. So everything is important. Marketing is important. sellings important, sending your newsletter, getting your Instagram posts, all the things that require time, essentially. But you have to really get super intentional about what is going to push the needle for that week, I like to break things down by week. And at the end of the week, I’ll look at what I accomplished, how I felt, check my energy, check my attitude and my character toward other people. And really asked myself if I showed up as the person I intended to show up as, or if I got kind of caught up in that like narrow focus. This is this is my ultimate goal and you know, tunnel vision kind of attitude, and then determine what I need to let go of so that I can create space for things that actually move me forward. But I think routines in general, are really important and very challenging for people because everything seems important. So the hardest part is releasing the things that realistically aren’t as important. Maybe they’re just a little more fun or a little more stress relief, you know?

Nicole Laino
Yeah. And I think that one of the, the, the routines, they definitely the to do list when you’re a solopreneur. And you have to do everything, and then you’re learning new things. And you’re like, I want to implement this and you never look at the list to say, well, what can go because I can only do so much. That’s where I like the one thing that kept coming up for me was like, this is where a great visioning session once a month, or at least once a quarter, where you’re saying like, what’s the vision right now. And that’s the 30,000 square foot view, and then you start, you start fine, you know, fine tuning it as it goes down and whittling down and saying what belongs and what doesn’t. And it allows you to give yourself permission to say, You know what, for the next 30 days, this is not a priority. Because it doesn’t mean that you throw something out, and you never do it again, exactly. At your business, and you’re looking at your life and saying like for the next 30 days, these are the things that are the most important things for me to do in order for me to accomplish this goal, then you might say, well, these things, I either can just keep the lights on with them and not do them as intensely as I’ve been doing them or not do the middle one, right. And giving yourself that permission to let some stuff fall off the list. Because it doesn’t all belong on there all the time.

Erika Diaz-Castro
It doesn’t I love the word permission, I think people are waiting for someone else to give it to them. And they’re like, like you’ll you’ll see people talking to their coach or to their friends or to their partner. And they’re like, What do you think, friend, you’re the person, this is your call, you know, your life. And it’s great, I think to get input from people you trust. But ultimately, we have an internal compass, and not utilizing it just puts us at a disadvantage. You know,

Nicole Laino
I think that is one of the key markers in when you are up leveling, is you actually talk to fewer and fewer people about what you are going to do and you just start doing them.

Erika Diaz-Castro
Yeah, it’s also a sign you’re in alignment. Exactly. You’re

Nicole Laino
not need, you’re not looking for permission, you’re not looking for somebody to validate your thoughts, your feelings, your actions, you’re just like, This is what I’m going to do. And I’m going to do it I’m going to figure out a way rather than it being like I need to sit and chat with eight different people from different circles, see what their thoughts are on it and what they think about it, and whether whether they think I should go forward with it. So So, yes, needing less permission, and realizing like we all became entrepreneurs because we didn’t want a boss. And then we go around asking for permission from everyone in our lives to do the thing that we want to do to have this business that we want to create. So ironic, right? Humans,

Erika Diaz-Castro
you have permission to choose your priorities. Just know, you know,

Nicole Laino
and it’s okay for that priority to be you.

Erika Diaz-Castro
Yes, I always I always advocate for you being in your top two, always. And I don’t say top one because we’re, I’m being realistic, like we are women and we want to serve naturally in some capacity. But at least put yourself in the top two and at least give yourself the basic needs, you know, rest, proper nutrition, some type of system where you give yourself space to decompress and process. You know, that downtime, whether it’s, you know, only 15 minutes or 30 minutes of like stillness, but I think a lot of us don’t prioritize recharging because we want to do all the things and all the things suddenly become more important than us.

Nicole Laino
Absolutely. And that, so you have permission, everybody listening to make yourself one of your top two priorities Erica said so So did I know, but you really everybody should be taking the time to, you know, recognize why you aren’t giving yourself permission about things why you aren’t putting yourself first or, you know, whenever we’re making priorities, pay attention to what you feel you shouldn’t make a priority, because that’s really telling to you as well. So, Eric, everyone’s gonna want to know how they can keep in touch with you, and how they can stay in touch and get more information, knowledge and just guidance from you what’s the best way for them to follow you after this.

Erika Diaz-Castro
So I’ve been spending less time on social in the social way. So I was on Instagram a lot, but it didn’t align with my priorities when I sat down and like revisited it again. So you can catch me on Instagram here in there at Mrs. Diaz Castro, Mrs. DIAZC, A S T. R O, but you probably want to just check me out right on my website, you can shoot me a message. listen to a podcast episode. I offer alignment audits, if that’s something that someone thinks they need. And here in there, I drop live webinars, so I can always share the link, if that’s something you’re interested in, participating in, and they’re free. So you know, just a little extra push if you need it. And my website is Kestrel strong.com.

Nicole Laino
All right. So follow her on Instagram, because why not? It’s at Mrs. Castro. You can sign up for a free alignment audit, and they can find that on your website. I can’t stress on.com Yep. Excellent. So everybody stay in touch with Erica there. I would definitely sign up for a free alignment audit. I might hit you up for that because who doesn’t need a little alignment audit for themselves, but they should definitely check that out. And you have free webinars and free like workshops which is amazing and such a great resource for everybody. And everybody that I have on here guys, just so you know, when they offer something for free. It’s a real value free and not a one of those, you know, covert sales pitch things. So check out her website her her webinars because they are going to be action packed and full of value for you. Erica, thank you so much for being here, everybody. Thank you so much for listening. Thank you for being here. Remember that you are limitless and we will catch you on next week’s episode. Have a great one everyone