Episode 264

Welcome to Unshakeable with Human Design, the show dedicated to helping entrepreneurs use human design to shift from hustle to flow without sacrificing results. Come here to become an unshakeable human and build an unshakeable business according to your human design. I’m your host, Nicole Laino.

Hello, welcome everyone. Thank you for being here. This is a little intro before the intro just to let you know that we had some technical difficulties with this episode. When we went in to edit it, we realized that there was some clippings, some areas that don’t come out crystal clear.

And we just wanted you to know about that, that we are aware of it and my team did a really great job cleaning it up, but if you hear a few little glitches in this episode, we just wanted to apologize, let you know that that is not a regular thing on the show. All the other episodes that you listened to will be perfect, but this one has a few minor bumps in it, but it’s a really solid, great episode.

And we still wanted to bring it to you. So I hope you enjoy it without further ado. Here you go.

Hello and welcome to Unshakeable with Human Design, everybody. I’m your host, Nicole Laino, and we are here on a Monday morning, just the two of us. And I’m a little husky today because I have a bit of a cold. So excuse me if I’m using my sexy voice. I have been talking a lot over the last couple of weeks because I’ve been having clarity calls with people.

I hosted my Authority Accelerator Masterclass, which was this huge masterclass that we got such great feedback on. And I’ve been talking to so many people in my community who are going through the same thing. And I think there’s a lot of uncertainty out there right now.

I think there are a lot of people from around my social media and my audience. And then I also have friends who are different levels, who are beyond me. I have mentors that are beyond, and everybody’s talking about the same stuff. And the difference that I see does come down to one thing. And this is something that came up in the class and it got a really great reaction there and it’s something that I remind myself of every single day, and it’s something that high performers either know inherently or they’re somehow working around it. Maybe they don’t think about it exactly the way that I do, but they are embodying this. So I want to share that here with you.

But what I’m seeing is everybody’s talking about the same thing. There’s a lot of uncertainty. Things feel different. We’re having to do things differently than we used to. Some of the old stuff isn’t working, which makes people scared. Some new things are working, but we haven’t really figured out how to operate them as consistently as other stuff.

It feels like the audience has changed, it feels like the receptivity of people has changed, people are wanting different things, but in every change there’s always opportunity, right? But what I hear is in high level conversations, people are still identified with certain things. With success, with past successes that they have, with who they’ve built to be.

Now, if that gets rattled, there was a coach a long time ago who said this, and I’ve heard this in multiple ways, but we don’t get what we want in life. We get what we identify as. Now, I have some issues with that simply because of human design. And sometimes people can get that really confused with doing identity work in a certain way.

And if you have an open G center that can end up causing more trouble than success and growth. But at its core, that is correct. What are we identifying as? And that comes down to one core thing that I’m going to share with you. But I want you to ask yourself right now, what are you identifying with?

Are you identifying with shame? Are you identifying with success? Are you identifying with big, wildly successful launches? Are you identifying as someone who has FAILED launches? Are you identifying as somebody who has wasted money? Are you identifying as somebody who has invested well and is on the rise?

Are you identifying with 6 figure months? Thanks. Now notice I didn’t say, have you experienced these things? I’ve asked if you are identifying with them. And the headline here is that you either carry you to new heights that are beyond your wildest dreams, or it will tether you to the past or pull you back to points in your life or places that you have never ever wanted to go, or go back to.

It could keep you in a loop and cycle of self sabotage. What it comes down to, what the difference is between being able to identify with a vision that grows us or a vision that pulls us back and pulls us into what we do not want, is what are you identifying with? So the phrase that I repeat to myself every day, at some point, certainly when things don’t go well.

Because we have to find a place of neutrality in our energy. When something doesn’t go well, you’ve got to feel that. You have to feel the reality of it. How does this make me feel? In my programs, I teach you to tap through these things so you’re actually processing the emotion and releasing it, rather than just thinking it through, which sometimes can not be enough to move it all the way out.

But we gotta start somewhere. And you process that feeling, you sit with it, you deal with the reality of it, and then it’s time for you to choose. Now, what am I going to feel? Now, what am I going to identify with? Because nothing has any meaning except the meaning that we put on it. Let me say that again.

Nothing has any meaning except the meaning that we put on it. And that means everything from the smallest thing, like, what does this cup on my desk mean to me? What does this shirt that I’m wearing mean to me? I was robbed one time in Spain. We were on vacation and they robbed our Airbnb. And they didn’t take everything, they took things that were like close enough to windows that they could grab.

And one of the things was my jewelry box. And while I didn’t have really valuable things in there, thankfully I had them all on my body, everything that was really valuable. Or I left it at home. But I did have A necklace that wasn’t monetarily valuable.

It wasn’t like I couldn’t rebuy it or something. I don’t know what it even would have been worth, I doubt that they got anything that was worth much out of it, but it belonged to my grandmother. So that was a much more upsetting moment for me than it was for other people in the house who just had like a watch stolen.

Which insurance will cover it. Insurance couldn’t cover that. It was a very different meaning for me. Even now when I talk about it, it makes me sad because I’m like, I wish I could still wear my Nana’s necklace. Nothing has any meaning except the meaning that we put on it.

I choose to release that. And it’s the same thing with how we identify with successes and failures in our life. Can we remain neutral and recognize that this actually means nothing about me? This actually has nothing to do with me except what I choose to make it mean about me. Nothing has any meaning except the meaning that we put on it.

Now, I could have a, I could have a launch, I could do a sale, I could do something where I had goals, and then maybe I don’t reach my goal. Then what happens? I could make it mean that I’m a failure, that I wasted money, that it didn’t work, that what I’m doing is not worth anything, that I should quit, that I’m a failure.

I could do that. Or I could make it mean that I’m learning, I learned more, I know more, I’m more successful today than I was yesterday. There are so many ways that we can work with this, and it’s not about putting your head in the sand. It’s about being able to come to a neutral place, where you’re not putting all of that baggage and meaning on top of a result that you got, because you’re identifying with it and you’re making it mean something about you, You can’t be objective and make good decisions from that place.

Now you’re in your shame. Now you’re in your fear. You are in a low frequency of who you are as a human being. Nothing has any meaning except the meaning that I put on it. If you keep repeating that to yourself, you will find that those moments of feeling like it’s your fault or like something you have to carry with you, they start to go away.

And if it doesn’t, then it’s your sign that there is more work for you to do there. There is inner work for you to do. And that’s why the inner work never stops. Every single high performer that I know, I don’t know if they’re asking this specific question of themselves. Nothing has any meaning except the meaning that I put on it.

What meaning am I putting on this? I don’t know if they’re asking that question. They are doing inner work. They are mastering themselves every single moment. They are feeling their feelings. They are moving through things. It is not easy out there, but the ones who make things happen are dealing with the shitstorm on the back end.

And they are processing the way that it makes them feel. They are processing their emotions because they know that it’s not sustainable, we’re not in a business where you can grow as a personal business, as a personal brand if you aren’t growing as a person. Our ability to hold more comes from us having a clean, energetic being. We have to be open. We have to create space for the success that we want. Shame, guilt, feelings of failure, feelings like you’re not good enough, feelings like you’re going to play small. All of that stuff is taking up the space that you want success to fill. Now we can’t identify too much with the success either.

It’s great if you could stay neutral and just say that none of this has any meaning except the meaning that I put on it. Now, if I want to put on the suit of, this means that I’m on my way. Does that carry me and help my vision? Well, let’s see. Let’s try that on. That sounds far more nurturing to what you want versus playing into something that you do not want.

Your energy is going to be guiding you either backwards or forwards. So you better learn to master it. You better learn to come to the table with a clean energetic slate and choose what you put on it, what you allow to be put there. Work through your stuff. Question. Put it on a sticky note. Put it on your desk.

Put it someplace that you can see it because this is something you’ll want to come back to time and time again. What am I putting meaning on? What am I identifying with and allowing a result to pin an identity on me that maybe I did not choose?

This is a practice that you can go through every day of recognizing what are you putting meaning on? And if you do that, you will start to feel a shift in your energy. You’ll notice the drag that the negative identities, those negative meanings are pulling down on you. You will feel that drag.

When you start to do this work, you’ll notice it. Right now, it might just be the way that you are. That you’re so identified with the things that you do not want, it’s actually creating more of them. It’s actually become who you are. And that is a key factor in trying to figure out what is holding you back.

That will be one of those things. Are you identifying so much that you have become the things that you don’t want? That you’re bringing them into every interaction, into every action that you take, into every piece of content you write? You’re dragging that old identity that does not serve you with you.

We don’t want that. So ask this question. I hope you got value out of this. I hope that this is something that you can take into your week, take into your months, because this is something, like I said, remind yourself of this every single day. I promise you, you will start to see shifts if you do. So thanks for making it all the way to the end of this episode with me, everybody.

I appreciate you. And remember, I love you. In order to have an unshakeable business, first become an unshakeable human. So thanks for letting us help you become unshakeable with human design, everyone. We’ll see you next time.

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Go to nicolelaino. me forward slash podcast links to join the group, book a human design reading with me, or access our free human design resources. We’ll see you there.