Hello and welcome to Unshakeable with Human Design everyone. I’m your host Nicole Laino and today I want to talk about success. Specifically, I want to talk about the role of deconditioning in success, because this issue came up during my latest Authority Accelerator Masterclass.

The Authority Accelerator for those of you who don’t know, are my five day free masterclass that I do every so many months where I put on this workshop for everyone where I teach you how to craft a million dollar message and a sales system all according to your human design. I take you through the energetic side of building a business as well as the strategic side and I talk about marrying these two because honestly, you need both.

You need energy and you need strategy. And one of the topics and themes that kept coming up with a lot of people who were participating in this round of the workshop, was this feeling like they weren’t ready, or wondering, am I ready for this next step? And what I’ve noticed is that particularly people who have been in the entrepreneurial game for a little while, and maybe this is you, where maybe you’ve invested in some things and they haven’t worked out to the level that you thought they would.

I definitely get the sense that there’s a lot of fatigue right now. There is this sense of grinding, and pushing, and trying to find your groove. And will I ever get to that point where things don’t feel so hard? As I was talking to people and as I was guiding people through these workshop sessions, and talking to different participants in it.

And honestly, even just hearing some friends and people in the industry right now, that this one phrase that my first coach ever, James Wedmore used to say to us, when you joined his program, he would say, your success is inevitable. And then he would say, everything is working out in my favor.

These are mantras that he had instilled in himself. And he was giving them to us and saying, you have to believe that your success is inevitable. You have to believe that everything works out in your favor. And when you start to make those shifts, if you can align with those beliefs, and really mean them, then truly your success will be inevitable.

And I remember when I first started the journey and I first heard that, those sounded like great words, but I could not connect to them. I could not energetically connect to them. And one of the mantras that I put out there, and I’ve said it on this show, and I say it to my clients all the time is that your thoughts lie, your words lie, but your energy never does.

And this was a case of, in the beginning I would say my success is inevitable. And that was where my words were lying. I wanted those to be true. My thoughts when I thought that my success is inevitable. I’d say that to myself. Energetically, it was not the truth. Energetically, it was, I don’t know if this is going to work.

That was the belief. And the belief is more than just an intellectual understanding. It’s not just words. The belief is the energetic connection that we have to things. And one thing that I was explaining during one of our bonus sessions that I held during the Authority Accelerator, was the role of conditioning in our beliefs, and in our energy, and in the way that we show up.

Because here’s a big difference. Your success is inevitable absolutely is something that you need to connect to. You need to feel like what you are doing has the potential and possibility to work. So if you’ve heard people say things like, get into the energy of what you want.

Align with potential, align with possibility. Can you do that? Can you connect to what if it all went right? The truth is that a lot of people cannot. And I count myself as one of those people for a very long time. And this is where self sabotage comes from. This is where if you’re looking at the outside world, you’re saying I’m doing the things, I’m showing up, I’m taking action, I feel like I’m doing what I’m told, but for some reason I’m not getting the result that was promised.

Now you may blame the people that you signed up with and say their thing doesn’t work, or maybe you’re one of those people who turns it on yourself and turns it into blame and shame on you. Where you say maybe I’m just not good enough. Maybe I’m not cut out for this.

And one of my clients, Kaitlin, who was on the show recently, she did a little interview inside the Masterclass for us, so people could hear about her experience in my program.

And she was saying, I had all the pieces when I started before this program. I knew how to write content, I’d taken programs and been coached in all sorts of strategies, but it never really came together. And I asked her, how did human design play a role in the way that you feel now? I was like, do you feel unshakeable now? And she’s like, oh my God, a thousand percent. And the reason for that is, when you pull all the pieces together, when you start to decondition your design, then you start to feel like anything is possible for you. You’re able to align with possibility.

Now, let me break down what conditioning is and how it shows up for us. Energetically what conditioning is. Now, you know how we talk about it. We say deconditioning the not self of the undefined ego is not feeling worthy. I’m not enough. Deconditioning, the not self of the head center is thinking about problems and trying to solve problems that aren’t yours to solve, that aren’t important for you.

Thinking about things that don’t matter. We have these not self themes. I want to take this a level deeper. Conditioning is the underlying beliefs that you have usually connected to those themes. That’s why human design gives us the in, it tells us, this is where we want to look. This is the map that we can use to figure out where our beliefs might be hiding, and where they might be doing the most damage, and what way might they be showing up. So in that open ego, we can listen for that voice of saying, I’m not good enough, but then we have to go a level deeper, which is what I do with EFT.

We can’t just say, I am worthy. I am enough. Cause that’s words again. And quite frankly, our energy might saying bullshit. If we’re saying I am worthy, I am enough. Even if you have a defined ego, it might be bullshit because you were taught to not trust that you were enough.

Even though you have consistency and capacity for that. I count myself as one of those people. I have a defined ego and I did not feel like enough for most of my life. So what do we do with that? How do we connect with what we want to be the truth? What maybe we intellectually know is the truth.

I knew I was worthy. I knew I was enough. But I had conditioning that made me feel like that was not true. So how do I align my energy with what I intellectually know, or want to connect to? How do I connect with the affirmation? How do I connect with the belief? How do I take a belief like my success is inevitable and connect to that?

Like everything, there is an energetic and a strategic part to this. To connect to something like your success is inevitable, which if you can connect to that belief, you can pretty much do anything. But I chose these two mantras. Your success is inevitable, and everything is working out in your favor.

These two are tenets that if you live by them, if you can really connect to these, you can truly create success in every area of your life. It will change your life. But you can’t just say them. You have to really believe them. You have to really connect to them. So the energetic part of that is you have to look at the beliefs that have been instilled in you, the energy.

What do you really feel when you connect to your success as inevitable? Is it, it’s not inevitable. You’re not enough. Is that the truth? If it is, then you have to look at that. You have to be willing to look your shadow right in the face and observe it, without necessarily acting on it, you don’t want to give it more energy, but can you look at it and say the truth of it, that it’s there?

And then can you start to transcend it by going into it and dealing with the emotion that is tied to that belief? This is what makes EFT so powerful to me, is that it allows us a therapeutic way to go into those emotions, to work through them and actually move them out of our body because it’s the emotion that tethers a belief to us.

It’s not the belief itself. I’m not enough. If you know it not to be true, that should be enough, right? No, I’m absolutely enough. Here’s all the proof. Here’s my badass list. Here’s all the ways that I am wonderful. We can do all of that work. but energetically, if you are emotionally attached to it, if there’s some trauma that made you feel like you were not enough, then you’ve got to deal with that.

So that’s the energetic side. The strategic side is, if you don’t have anything built, if you haven’t built a way to make your success inevitable, if you haven’t taken steps to create the strategic elements if you don’t have offers that are aligned, if you don’t have a sales system, if you don’t have a way for people to connect with you and to be nurtured by you. If you don’t have all of those pieces together in a way that feels like they are working, then it will be difficult to feel like your success is inevitable. But here’s the beauty of it is once you do build those things, it is so easy to feel like your success is inevitable.

And Kaitlin and I were talking about this in her interview during the masterclass. She’s like, I can see it now. I can see the finish line. And I know the finish line will move, like there will be another goal past that, but I can see it. And now it just feels like, I’m on my way there.

That’s what happens when you have the strategic and the energetic work in alignment. When you’re laying the foundation and the infrastructure for what you need to make it happen but at the same time you are dealing with the beliefs that are keeping you from executing that strategy that you’re putting together effectively and keeping you from feeling open to actually going down that path.

This is the work that most people miss. They do the strategy stuff. Maybe some of it works. Maybe some of it doesn’t. But they keep pushing the strategic element. Keep learning a new tactic. Keep showing up and launching. But they haven’t really prepared for the launch. They haven’t gotten people into the launch. They don’t have an offer that aligns with what they’re teaching in the launch.

There’s all of these strategic elements that maybe are not working, right? But they’re still building them, and they’re looking for the next thing, and the next thing, and the next thing. But they never really deal with the energetic elements that are coming up. The roadblocks that they are continuing to have thrown up in their way, and they keep looking for a new tactic to get past it. That isn’t how success is created. Success is created by opening up to new levels of possibility within yourself.

You’ll start to find that your strategic stuff will start working so much more consistently and effectively when you open up energetically. This is playing the energetic game, and the strategic game. You can’t do just one. You can’t just be strategic because you will be bumping up against yourself and your beliefs and all the things that you are refusing to look at.

Whatever it is that you are avoiding feeling is the thing that you need to look at and I guarantee you that is the stone that you will move, and it will clear your path in more ways than you can count. But most people won’t do that work. Or, conversely, they are doing all the energetic work and they are not laying any strategic foundation.

They have a few tactics that maybe worked or didn’t work, but their way of avoiding is falling in love with the healing. So I love your success is inevitable, my success is inevitable as a benchmark mantra to test yourself with how much do you believe? How deeply do you believe in what you are doing and the way that you are doing it in how you are showing up?

How are you triggered? When we say the phrase, my success is inevitable. Say that out loud and notice where you feel it in your body. Does it feel like an opening? Do you feel excited by it? Do you feel like, yes, it is, or do you feel a little shut down by it? What’s the thought that comes up? What’s the belief that comes up?

What’s the truth? The truth will set you free. But we have to be willing to look at it. We have to be willing to go into it and we have to be willing to transmute it into something else, taking that pain and being able to transmute it into something that works for us.

That’s what everything works out in my favor really means. Then if you can look at your life as a constant unfolding, when you encounter an obstacle, that it was somehow put there for the purpose of you overcoming it, that obstacles exist, that triggers exist, that difficulty exists because those are the necessary traits, skills, or things you need to let go of in order to get everything that you’ve been asking for.

Can you treat life like a game? And that’s the beauty of human design, and the deconditioning work can make that process go a whole lot faster. And like I said, I use EFT and I don’t normally release these,

but we do have a mini deconditioning library. If you are interested in doing that, this is a taster of my EFT tappings.

So this is not a free thing. This is actually a small little program. We usually only offer it as a add on to our bigger programs, but I’m gonna throw it out here. Just DM me the word tapping on Instagram, if you’d like the link for that, and I did not plan this. So we’ll have a URL for you down in the show notes. If you want to just click through there, or just DM me the word tapping on Instagram and I’ll send you whatever link we ended up setting up for this. So I use EFT tapping to get through this process of the energetic side much, much faster.

This is how we start to move our emotions So that they are no longer holding us back. So that we’re able to energetically connect with something like, my success is inevitable, and actually have it feel like the truth. That is one thing that I come back to this phrase, my success is inevitable, and whenever I say it now, there is a level of, of course it is.

Absolutely it is. And I know I did not have that always. I remember not having it. I remember saying, my success is inevitable, and it just feeling like hope. It did not feel inevitable. It felt like something if I keep saying this enough, maybe I’ll start to believe it. But that’s not what made me believe it.

What made me believe it was deconditioning all the beliefs and emotions and trauma and stuck stuff that made me think that it wasn’t true. I had to deal with the beliefs that I had. That I was not enough was a huge one. And then I had to start showing up with a strategy. So that every day it felt like I was getting closer and not further away.

So I hope that this inspires you to do the energetic and the strategic work wherever you get that support and however it is that you choose to go down those paths. But I just felt like this was such a theme that was hitting home for me, and I thought it might be hitting home for you.

So I hope that we did our job here and that we inspired you to take action in both of these areas.

And if you would like to check out the mini deconditioning library, I have a whole big one, but the small one, the mini deconditioning library, just DM me the word tapping on Instagram and we will send you the link directly there.

Or go down to the show notes and see whatever the link is that we put down there for you, because I don’t have a URL for you. But thank you so much for being here. Thank you for making it all the way to the end of this episode with me. I appreciate you. And remember, in order to have an unshakeable business, you must first become an unshakeable human.

So thanks for letting us help you become unshakeable with human design, everyone. We’ll see you next time.