Episode 466:


Hello, and welcome to Unshakeable with Human Design. I’m your host, Nicole Laino. And today it’s just us. We are going to be doing a little bit of a human design business connection episode here. 

And Human Design, I think one of the things that I love about it so much and how it’s changed my life and changed the lives of literally thousands of people that I’ve worked with and the various ways that I connect with people, it’s the fact that it gives you this opportunity to rewrite your story, to see your life, your luck, your lessons all through this new lens. It gives you a really interesting and powerful perspective on your life. And as you know, perspective is everything. This is. Perspective is what allows somebody. When I worked for Goldman Sachs, one of the things that I thought was pretty amazing was that the CEO at the time that I worked there, his father was like a sanitation worker. 

And he grew up just feeling capable and very smart and very much that lift yourself up by your bootstraps kind of story. But he went on to go to Harvard and then to run one of the biggest banks in the entire world. And that comes from. It starts from a perspective. It starts from a, I can. I will. I’m capable. I’ll figure it out. Just something in you that says that you’re worthy, that you can possibly do it. And the stories that don’t go the way that we want them to go usually start with maybe they have a little bit of hope, but then they lose it. Maybe they start to look at life through the lens of saying, like, I can’t, because. 

So that man didn’t look at his life and say, I can’t succeed because my dad is a sanitation worker and isn’t a Wall street executive. I absolutely have had moments where I’ve done both of these things where I have been a victim of circumstance, where I have looked at life and looked at my opportunities and looked at where I am through the lens of why I don’t have them. What could I blame for my lot in life? This is very gate 55 sort of lesson, right? Gate 55, the shadow is victimhood. Victimhood is that feeling of, like, things happen to me, not for me. And human design. I think Is one of the. There are many tools that do this, but I think it’s one of the most powerful to give you a new perspective on yourself. Why did that happen? 

Maybe it wasn’t an accident. Maybe I’m here to learn from it. Maybe this is my lesson. Maybe this is my thing. And in today’s episode, I want to talk about one of those key pieces in human design. There are obviously human design has a million aspects to it that can help you do this, but I’m going to speak to you about one of the most powerful, in my opinion, for giving you that perspective. So there is something in human design called. Well, and we’re actually talking about this from more of a gene keys perspective because this comes from. This is very tied to astrology. It is not so much in the traditional human design language or universe. It’s more of like that sister arm of the gene keys, where we get this from. And in Gene Keys, Richard Rudd calls this your vocation sphere. 

It is also known as your core wound. This is one of those things that when you first have a connection to it. And I remember when I first got into the gene keys and like everything with human design, when we started from that place of like, I need to know, I need to know. And we’re looking for answer. We often don’t find the answer because we’re looking so hard for it. We’re in, like, the wrong energy to receive what it is. That is the real wisdom here. Because we’re looking for something finite. We’re looking for something that can fix a problem. We’re looking for something that will change things versus allowing the relationship to our design to change us, to show us and work from the inside out versus looking for this outward result from it. What’s going to make me money? 

What’s going to make me magnet? What’s going to make my life easier Now? Yes, all of these things, they can do these things. Human design can open up doors within you that seem permanently locked or like you would never find them. But if you’ve listened to this show for a long time, you know that I always say that human design is not the treasure, you’re the treasure. Human design is the map leading you to those spots within yourself that hold all the glory, all the secrets, all the keys to every door you want to unlock after it. That’s the power of understanding yourself and exploring yourself through this lens. But when we put expectations on top of the system, on top of that exploration, what we often find is that we are in the mind game. 

So that, like, deeper work that this is really meant to do on you doesn’t get deep enough. It doesn’t penetrate that mental place that we’re in. So my job as a human design coach and somebody who works with people on this is to get you past that mental stage. That’s my first job, is like, can I get you past you needing this to work yesterday? Of course we would love it to work yesterday, but that’s a tall order. That’s a lot of pressure. Can I get you to release that pressure and can I get you out of that mental place where you’re looking for this to do something and to recognize that? Because I’m telling you, don’t make it need to do something. Releasing that need to make it do something does not mean that it won’t do anything. 

Do you see what I’m saying there? That releasing that pressure on it of what you need it to be doesn’t mean it won’t do all the things that you want it to. You just aren’t approaching it from, I need this from you. I need this from you. I need this from you. It’s a relationship like anything else. When we come at a relationship, any kind of relationship, from a place of, like, true neediness, that energetic, like, give me what I need. And if you don’t, then I don’t trust you. That’s not a relationship that is going to go very far. That’s a relationship that’s going to break apart or just develop into, like, serious codependency. But what I want to talk about today is this vocation sphere. It’s also known as your unconscious. Mars is the placement. 

And it’s so powerful because this is one of those keys. There are so many in human design. There’s obviously your incarnation cross, but that’s a bigger theme, right? The incarnation cross. Everybody is so enchanted with it and I understand why. It’s like the purpose in our life, right? Who’s not seduced by that? A little bit to know, like, we all want to know what we’re here for. We all want to know why was I put on this earth. And the incarnation cross absolutely tells us what that path kind of is. It does let us know a little bit. And like I’ve said, some of them, they hit you over the head. And your incarnation cross is like, oh, my God. It’s like, it’s so true to who I am. Usually it’s far more nuanced than that. 

Usually it’s a little trickier than that you need to embody it a bit more. You need to again, not be looking for that answer from it in order to receive it, in order to really know that you’re in it. The minute I get into a mental place with this stuff, even after all this time that I’ve been doing it, but don’t think that I don’t get scared, don’t think that I don’t have pressure, don’t think that things don’t work out and I wonder if they’ll ever work out again. All of that stuff happens to me and when it does, I end up in that mental place and I might be looking for something to do, something for me. Strategies to work tomorrow. What am I going to do? How am I going to do it? 

And I go into that mental place which is where that quote unquote not self takes over and I become not me and I’m not the best of myself. And then those results that I want, that I’m pushing for get further and further away. So luckily, I’m telling you, it’s not. That never happens to me. I just don’t stay there very long. I can see it quickly and I recognize I’m like, I’m in that mental place. I have to release it, I have to expand into this. I can’t contract into it. And that’s one of those, like, kind of mastery of this stuff that we’re all trying to achieve is like this ability to be in flow. Flow isn’t just getting more shit done. I know that we think it is. Oh, I’m in flow. So I’m getting so much stuff done. 

It’s wonderful when it happens. But that’s not really what flow is. Flow is the ability to feel contraction and relax into it and find openness and find pathways that you didn’t know existed until that happened. To allow when you’re pushing, to allow something to happen, when you are relaxing too much to realize that it’s time to take action and it requires some effort. This is flow. To never be too far one side of the spectrum and too far away from the other one. That’s the power of being in flow. That’s what it really means. It’s to flow with things. Not for everything to work all the time. No, but it’s the ability to make anything work, no matter what, without force, without constant action, without grinding. Can we allow? Can we learn to let things in? 

Can we be both masculine and feminine and balance that? So before I continue we are doing a masterclass on the vocation sphere on your unconscious Mars. And this is where I’m going to dig into all of this. So if you are interested in this topic, please come. You can show up to that. Just DM me the word “VOCATION” on Instagram. I’m @nicolelainoofficial on Instagram. Or you can go to nicolelaino.com/vocation, and you can register right there. If this is a topic that interests you and you want to really work with this part of your chart. Because that’s what we do in these workshops. We are working with them. And if you sign up for the VIP, you get even more and you get Q&As and all of that fun stuff. So it’s a really cool thing that we do. 

To join Nicole for the Unconscious Mars – Career Gate Masterclass DM her “VOCATION” on Instagram or go tonicolelaino.com/voacation

Every month we do a different masterclass. Let’s talk about this. The vocation sphere. What’s so powerful about this? I always say that the vocation sphere. When you start to learn about your unconscious Mars and you start to learn about this position, where you’ll start is in a mental place. You’ll be like trying to figure it out. And I always say, like, if you’re trying to figure it out, you’re going to miss it. You’re going to miss what it’s really about. You might think you know, but you don’t, and that’s okay. Sometimes that’s just a part of the journey is being in the figure it out phase. But what the potential is to see this particular gate, this particular energy, as this is a big part of your life’s journey. This is a big part. 

When I learned about my unconscious Mars, when I started to work with this, I immediately had some thoughts about it because this is one of my repeating gates. I have this gate in two positions in my chart. And it’s a bigger energy for me. So it’s kind of. It showed up a lot. Some things are more in our face in our chart than other things. Plus, Mars is kind of big energy as well. So that’s part of why this is so powerful. Mars is our ability to take action. Our it is the initiating force, it’s power. And so when we’re talking about a wound, well, where is your power? Maybe not coming through in the most aligned or easy way due to your own issues, your own blocks that are keeping you from moving forward. 

So many people come to me and they say, you know, Nicole, I have such a hard time maintaining momentum. I have such a hard time being consistent. And these aren’t people that don’t get anything done. These aren’t people that haven’t built anything, but they know that they’re capable of so much more. They know something inside them is holding them back from gaining things outside them. They know that there’s some part of them inside that is keeping them from taking action consistently and moving in the direction of their dreams. It’s a very frustrating thing, and I understand it deeply because I had the same problem. Why can’t I move in the direction of my hopes, my dreams, what I know to be my potential, what I could feel in my bones? 

There is nothing more frustrating and heartbreaking than feeling like you have untapped potential, that you have this potential that is there for you, but you cannot touch it, you cannot reach it, or you cannot hold it. And this particular gate holds the secrets to that. I always say that this is the one that. If you’ve seen the movie the Sixth Sense, where the kid at the end, sorry, spoilers if you haven’t seen it, but the movie’s like, 20 years old, so if you haven’t gotten to it yet, sorry, you could Fast forward for 10 seconds, but the movie, The Sixth Sense, at the end of the movie, you find out that there’s, like, this big reveal at the end where you realize that one of the main characters was dead the whole time. And they kind of take you through the whole movie. 

You watched the whole movie not realizing it. And then when you realize it at the end, they do a, like, flashback of the whole movie where they show you all these scenes where all of the clues and Easter eggs were there entire time, letting you know that he was, in fact, dead. That’s what the core wound is like to me. The vocation sphere. It is the. It’s like once you learn it, you flash back through your whole life and you realize that every challenge, every lesson, all of them were tied to this shadow. And every win, every big milestone move in the right direction in your life was tied to the gift somehow. So we are going to be breaking all of this down in the masterclass because this is one of those things. 

We’re going to go much deeper into what this all means, how you connect it with your chart, how you start to have a relationship to this and start to see it through. Not a lens of understanding. Like, you know, we use the word wound, and some people will think, like, oh, this is this thing that’s wrong with me. No, A wound can be healed, and even when it’s healed, it’s a shadow. I like to Talk about it about as a shadow, because this is a tool you can use for your own mastery. But even more importantly, when we’re in business, that mastery is something that attracts the correct people to you for exactly what you are here for. 

I know that everybody in my world, and I’ll reveal kind of my connection with this and my attraction with my particular unconscious Mars, my vocation gate. In the masterclass, I will be talking about more of my reflections with this and how I suppose I could use the word use it, but I would say it’s something that I’m very conscious of as being something that people need from me. And the more I master this in myself, the more I get people who need that and who I can actually help with it. This is true with all of our gifts in if you’ve been listening for a long time, I talk about the authority matrix. 

This is one of those gates in there, and this is a big player in that all of your gifts are things that once you transmute the shadow into the gift, you can start attracting people with it. I’m saying, this one is so powerful. This one is the one that’s like, you will evolve with it for ages, through your whole lifetime. You will never be done elevating yourself through this thing. And there are so many questions that you can ask yourself that lead you deeper into yourself, into your magic, and will show you how you actually have something to offer people. This can be your offers, this can be your message. This is a very big attraction aspect for you of what people are going to be looking for from you. Specifically. 

I dig into this all the time when I’m doing my messaging, when I am talking to clients, when I’m talking to potential clients, I’m listening and I hear this gate come through all the time. And I can answer from actual wisdom that I have from this, because it’s my story. So I started this episode off by saying that human design allows you to rewrite your story to see it through a different lens. This particular gate might be an area where you are beating yourself up. You are seeing this particular area as you being a failure in some way, as you maybe not being able to overcome something that you should, or maybe you feel like you were born with it and it’s a flaw and you’ll never be rid of it. I certainly did. That was my story. 

And when you see this, you will see yourself differently. When you see yourself differently, you’ll start to work with this. Instead of brow beating yourself or shaming yourself for not being different for not being better. And when you can shift that, everything starts to change. Okay, so I’m going to leave this one here. I hope you come to the masterclass because that is where we’re going to dig deep into how this is actually playing in your life with your unconscious Mars gate, your vocation. And we’re going to dig into that inside the masterclass. So all you have to do DM me the word “vocation”VOCATION” on Instagram, I’m @nicolelainoofficial. Or go to nicolelaino.com/vocation and you can register right there on the website. We’ll have it all linked up in the show notes for you so it’s nice and easy. 

To join Nicole for the Unconscious Mars – Career Gate Masterclass DM her “VOCATION” on Instagram or go tonicolelaino.com/voacation

Thank you so much for being here. I appreciate you. And remember, in order to have an unshakable business, you must first become an unshakable human. So thanks for letting us help you become unshakeable with human design. We’ll see you next time.