Hello, and welcome to the limitless entrepreneur podcast. I’m your host, Nicole Laino. And I am here with a solo episode today. I am I want to share a little story with you. I want to talk to you about this as part experience that I have had. And it’s also, I think, a really important lesson.

The question I’m kind of going to be putting out there is, you know, is your coach conditioning you? And this isn’t to attack anyone, this is a question I want you to contemplate, I want you to ponder, I want you to start seeing things because that is that is the power of human design. That’s the power of what I hope is the power of this show. And what it’s helping you do is to turn inside and find the answers that live within you. And to start carving your own path. Rather than other people telling you, this is the way go that way only for you to walk down that path and find out well, that was the right way for you, but not for me. And those can be expensive and time consuming lessons. And I’m going to share with you one of mine, we’re also going to play with the concept of quantum leaps. And we’re going to talk a little bit about that. So buckle up, this is going to be a fun one, this is going to be an interesting episode.

So I’m inviting you to kind of come along with me. And we’re going to talk about human design, I’m going to talk about what you can find in your human design chart. Going beyond just your strategy and authority. Going beyond what a lot of people are talking about in human design, and strategy and authority. This is not me knocking it, it is the cornerstone of human design of understanding your design and the key to help you start using your energy properly. However, there are other aspects of the chart that are incredibly useful, very practical, and really, really insightful and eye opening and can start to show you what your path is, and more importantly, what your path is not. And we’re going to be talking about that.

And I’m going to share with you if you’ve done that, that’s okay. I’m going to share with you a story about how I did that. I’ve done that many times, I’m going to share one specific story about how I chased something outside of myself. And it became one of my more expensive, time consuming, and also eye opening lessons. And if I had known what I know now about my human design chart, if I had been aware of these particular aspects and done this specific work that I’m going to share with you, I could have avoided those lessons. And that’s why I’m sharing this with you, I could have avoided the expensive price tag, I could have avoided the pain, I could have avoided the confusion. And I could have I could have potentially saved myself a whole lot of time. And then further along. But but you get the benefit of this experience.

So I’m going to show you how to use your human design chart in a slightly different way than we’ve talked about on the show before and probably the different way than you’ve been taught to look at your human design chart. So let’s talk just a little bit about quantum leaps. And what they are, since they are a very hot topic, and we hear about them a lot. So quantum leaps, I think people think a lot of times that because the way that they’re put out there, quantum leaps are used in people’s marketing a lot to talk about, you know, a program that you’ll buy, and they’ll show you how to have your quantum leap. And there’s this sense that there’s something that you need to be there’s some strategy you don’t have, there’s something that you are currently not being that you need to start being that you need to be something else in order to experience this quantum leap. So, and this typically leads us to pursue programs, and and mentors who can help us become this next level self to become this next level of who we are. Like, they’re going to show us the way.

So but in my experience, and to just kind of bring it back to the Quantum Leap thing. It isn’t about adding something new. It’s not about changing who you are in a sense of becoming something that you aren’t already. Now the catalyst for quantum leaps isn’t typically adding anything at all. It’s subtracting. It’s releasing old ways. It’s stopping, going down and following the red herring, which is really what we’re going to be talking about today. It’s going to be about stopping yourself from going down the rabbit hole, which is your pattern, which is your shadow pattern which is your subconscious taking you down a hole that only leads to more of the hole. It takes You’re away from what you want. And the whole time you think that you are pursuing what you want and what will get you there and only to find out that you are burned out along the way. Typically, with less money, and not something, you know, you can come out with a lot of clarity. But you don’t typically feel great about it, because you feel like you wasted a lot of time. So.

So what we’re going to discuss, and what I’m going to show you is how to experience a quantum leap, it’s about releasing an old pattern that you have. And that frees you up to take action in a new way, show up a new way, because you are no longer leaking energy into that shadow part of you into that part that don’t no longer serves you, it actually never served you. Just somewhere along the line, you picked up the idea. And I’m going to show you how it actually exists in your chart, there is an energy that exists in your chart, or multiple energies that are saying Come this way, come this way, come this way. And that’s not actually true for you. So it’s really important to start noticing what those are identifying them, and ultimately, no longer feeling like you need to follow them down that path, you no longer need to pursue them.

Because the way conditioning shows up is conditioning can show up in two ways. When we’re talking about centers. The centers are typically where if you are defined, you feel like you’re too much so you repress that energy. So if you have a defined throat, and maybe you grew up feeling like or being told that you talked too much, you might suppress your defined throat and not speak up and not use your voice and not speak your truth. That can be a conditioning of a defined center where it is showing up in an unhealthy expression. But more often than not, it is our open space, where that’s where the world can get in. That’s where we are vulnerable. That’s where the doors are open. And you go to sleep, and someone sneaks in that back door. That’s kind of what our open spaces like. And there’s their specific space in everybody’s chart that that is their vulnerability. And that’s really what we’re talking about here.

So it’s what your chart will show you. And this is this is another thing that I want to bring up why human design is so powerful, is that it shows you exactly what your conditioning is. So I’m going to share with you my story, I’m going to talk to you about a story about how I chased that red herring, I chased that shadow down a path and it cost me a lot of money, I’m going to share that with you. Now traditionally, people share these stories and say, This is what happened to me, don’t let it happen to you. But the truth is, is that in your chart, it’s gonna look different than it does in mine. My red herring could be your gold prize, that might be exactly the path that you should be going down. But only you would know that and and your chart is different than mine. And that’s why it’s so powerful. We’re actually giving you your unique code.

And I’ve heard so many people talk about codes. I’ve heard coaches use the term, your unique codes and you know, get the money code and all of these different code references that sounded really cool and hip. And I was always like, what does that really mean? And I would take those programs, I would listen to those masterclasses I would, you know, listen to those podcasts and just find out that it was really it was their code that they were sharing or something that worked for them. And that’s certainly valuable. However, I wouldn’t, I would try some of them and they wouldn’t work for me.

And I’m sure you’ve had that experience where you try somebody, something that worked for somebody exceedingly well. And then you go do it in a way that you think is exactly in line with the way that they did it and the way that they taught it, and you’re doing everything, quote unquote, right? But it doesn’t work for you. And maybe you just shrug it off and move on to the next thing where you go in pursuit of the next thing. Or maybe that conditions you terribly to think that something’s wrong with you, why can’t I make these things work? Why are they not working for me, they’re working for these other people, these people are having success, what’s wrong with me, and then we develop some shame and there’s more stuff that we have to release.

So it’s actually it’s about finding your unique code. That’s why human design is so powerful, because it will show you you have this defined you have this undefined This is how we find your shadow patterns. This is how we find your areas of repressed nature. This is how we find your unique strengths. This is how we find out if you are meant to truly have a niche or not all of These things can be found in your chart. It’s really, it’s really, really powerful.

So let me let me share my story because it illustrates the point. And I’ll show you but I wanted to put that caveat in there, that this may look different for you based on your chart. But it will help you find those aspects of your chart. So it’s not going to be exactly like for like, so. My story is that I hired a mentor a few years ago. And, and this is not me ragging on the mentor at all. This is not about them, this is about me. And the way I made decisions and the way that I determined what was correct for me or not, and how I went on these wild goose chases, so and how someone’s messaging can can condition us if we don’t know what we’re looking for, if we don’t know who we are. And we don’t know what our vulnerabilities are.

So I hired a mentor a few years ago, and it was a high ticket, high ticket program that I was a part of. And I her messaging was very much around being bold, being an I certainly had an idea that I needed to be more bold, I needed to be more bold in my messaging, I needed to be more bold in my branding, I needed to be bigger, I needed to be more shocking, more, more provocative, and I never really never really vibed with like the ultra sexy thing. Although some people, some people do. But I there was this sense of, I had to be like some of these other people that I was seeing.

And there was one in particular that I followed. And I admire her and I still to this day, I still do admire her to this day. And I followed her for a quite a long time. And then one day, she made an offer. And I was just like this is it. And there was a lot of a lot of messaging around around stepping into your power and doing it in a very specific way that was speaking to being shocking, initiating, really stepping in and just being bold in the moves that you make. And I was like, I need to do this, this is what I need to do. This is exactly what I need to do. And she’s speaking to me. So I signed up for the program. And almost immediately, I felt like something was off. Like it just wasn’t right for me. And this was a long term container. And it didn’t feel right for me. And there was just something about it that it was, I could feel it in my energy that it was shutting down, it was pulling me down. But I’d committed to this. And, and I started to feel like something was wrong with me because I still I was getting all this information, I was in the energy of this person who had the thing that I supposedly needed unwanted. And I wasn’t able to do it. So I went through a period of really bashing myself for not being able to take action for not being able to step up for not being able to do what I set out to do.

Now I have a defined will center, I have a defined ego. So I can step in, I can I can see through all my commitments, I can I do have drive, I do have a lot of ambition that naturally exists in me, I do have something to prove, like I am here to prove something to myself and to the world. But I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t bring myself to do a lot of the work. It felt wrong to me it felt off. And in a way where I really I’m gonna say like I backed down. And I felt worse than before I started. I felt really disappointed in myself. I was and that sent me into this spiral of what’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with me? Why can’t you do this.

And now I’m adding I’m sure adding stuff now, but I’m no closer to my quantum leap. I am no closer to my quantum leap at all. In fact, I feel further away from it than ever, and I’m adding more and more conditioning to my mind, more shame, more guilt. Suddenly, I’m feeling like I’m not worth the investment anymore. If I’m not getting it here, how am I going to get it anywhere else? If this is truly what I need to be, how am I ever going to experience the level of success that I want? If I can’t do this, and I can’t be this? Oh my god, I let myself down was a moment that I did not enjoy at all. And like I said this is not me bashing the coach. She’s doing her job. She’s doing her thing.

I responded to it through my wounding, through my vulnerability through my conditioning. So I have something called a split definition, I have a small split. And that means that my defined areas in my human design chart can’t all speak to each other. So of all I have six centers defined in my chart, and three talk to each other, and another three don’t, that and another three talk to each other. So I have these like two groups that can that can pass energy back and forth. So my throat can connect to my spleen can connect to my ego, and my G center can connect to my sacral. And that can connect to my emotional center. So there are these, but there’s a break between the two sets of three. Okay.

And what that does, is those areas that can be bridged, that would bring them all together, they form what we call these, it’s, it’s a gap in the circuitry. And what that ends up doing is, that’s my greatest conditioning, those areas that my energy that I perceive, as missing from me, something’s missing. And one of those happens to be gate 51, it’s the gate of shock. It is the gate of this is the gate of I do it first, I do it better. I step up by bold it is the gate of initiation, it is part of the channel of initiation. This is an this is like the ego. This is like a true true ego gate. And this is a beautiful channel, and it is a beautiful gate. But I experience it as it’s missing from me. So I pursue it hard, hard.

Now I have six of these, I have six of these gates that exist. But this particular one is a big doozy for me, I chased this quality in my life, for I don’t even know how long probably my whole life. And it wasn’t until I started breaking down my chart in this way. And looking at my particular shadow patterns, my particular shadow pockets, these gates, these areas that I am most prone to follow the wrong path down. So the path of be bold, the passive be be out there and initiate that path of big moves that path of, of step up and do it. That’s a big one for me. So when someone says that, that’s, that’s the dog whistle, that’s the, that gets me going, I follow that.

And, and for a long time, I would pay you anything. If I thought you could get me there. If I thought you could complete me, because that’s what these gates feel like. That’s what these pieces feel like. Now, not everybody has these gates, it depends on your definition, I have a split definition is a small split is what we call it. And that means that that is where my conditioning lies in these particular gates and these six gates. And so it’s they’re very strong for me.

Now, they’re not bad. I can be in someone’s presence and have that actually be completed and have it feel good. But when we pursue it, thinking that something is missing from us, and that once we get it, we have it and now we’re complete. You can’t pursue anything outside of yourself, thinking it will complete you. That is the ultimate, the ultimate wrong path. And the red herring that we’re all on some crash course with. So, for some people, it’s your open centers. For some people, it’s these gates. For some people, it’s a bit of a combination of them. It really depends there are so many factors that your chart can show you to show you where you are most likely to experience a negative or unhelpful pattern of behavior. And once you know what they are, it’s part of it is awareness, allowing, noticing, you notice when it comes up and then it’s a practice of stopping, trying to be that thing or thinking that that thing will complete You.

So sometimes we have these people in our lives. And we’re wondering, why is this thing not working. And sometimes it’s because we’re thinking that something is going to complete us and it doesn’t. So when that person goes away, and that connection is no longer felt, you’re no longer in the energy of that thing you think will complete you. Like when I get off a phone call with that coach, and I no longer felt the same. I would think what’s wrong with me? Why did I have it before? And now I don’t have it anymore. How do I get it back? And then we’re addicted to this energy, we are addicted to feeling whole?

And the answer isn’t, well, I just need that thing. So I can feel whole all the time. No, the answer is feeling a whole without it. And knowing that you are whole without it. And that’s really what deconditioning is about. That’s the process I call becoming unshakable is about no longer feeling like you need to be completed by anything. And breaking the emotional addiction that we have to this to these feelings, and to stop chasing these things that we’re not thinking that they will somehow fit together to make us a whole person. Because you will never feel whole. If you think that something outside of you will complete you. You’ll never feel it. And that’s a really terrible feeling. And we end up in these horrible patterns of conditioning where we’re not experiencing the level of success that we want. And we don’t know why. So the answer isn’t to add anything. The answer is to subtract the need to to feel like you have to add something. The answer is to take away that addiction, and remove that addiction to being something that you’re not.

And this is what we call this, why we call them energy leaks, we pour all of our energy into these holes in us. And what happens when you pour energy into a hole, pour water into a hole, it just flows through. There’s nothing there to catch it. So when we pour and pour and pour, or money, pour time, for energy, for tears, pain, we pour it all into that hole. And we wonder why aren’t I getting better? Why isn’t the bucket getting more full? Because it doesn’t belong there. It’s not your strength. So this is what this is what human design can start to tell you.

And so if you are listening to this, and you want to continue that human design journey I do, I do recommend sitting down for a reading a human design reading, you can book those on my website and Nicolelaino.me We have a under the work with me section, you can book a reading right then in there, you can certainly book that reading and then jump into the limitless entrepreneurs where we go on this deconditioning journey, where we start to build you back up from a place of understanding of your wholeness, and seeing who you truly are. So that is we have a six month and a 12 month container in there. And that’s where you get coached. And you actually get to work with me on this journey of being whole. And you can do that within your own personal life. Or you can take advantage of the business building resources that we also have in that program. We have people doing both inside there.

So I hope that you found this useful. I hope that this opened up some ideas on on how this chart is more than just strategy and authority. It’s more than just the basics. Although the basics are necessary. They’re foundational. But it can show you so much. And it’s so useful. It is this beautiful blend of masculine and feminine energy of how to do it, here’s what you do. And then here’s also how you can lean back. And if you’re doing these things that actually leads to you having to do less than when you stop pouring the energy into the things that you’re not and only focusing on the areas that you are and feeling whole in that process. This is how you get to make more and work less. This is how you get to have a life filled with ease and simplicity. And you stop chasing these ideas or spinning on ideas that aren’t really correct for you.

This has been transformative for me. And even though I told you a story that feels pretty negative, it’s actually I, it helped me find what I know now, and I can see it now. And part of my journey is to teach people how to use this. So I, I do see it as a useful experience. I wish it cost less money. But it was, it was a useful experience. And I hope that you found this, this experience this podcast useful and helpful for you. And I hope that you continue your human design journey, however you do it, I hope that you continue digging in and learning how to use your chart to uncover your strengths, and help you understand where the parts of you that are open. And there are where you can be beautifully wise about them. And you don’t have to pursue them or look to them to complete you. You are whole, you are complete right now just as you are. So I hope that you love this episode. If you did, please share it on Instagram, take a little snapshot, share it on LinkedIn or whatever platform that you’re on, tell me what you loved about it. Feel free to DM me on Instagram or on LinkedIn. I am over there. And I would love to hear from you. I’d love to hear what you loved about this podcast or what your human design journey is looking like I love to hear what what you guys are all going through. And if there’s something you’d like to hear covered on this show, please let us know that as well. So people remember your you are only limited by the limitations that you accept. And when you stop accepting those limitations. That is when you become limitless. So go out there and be limitless everyone. I will see you in the next episode.