In this Mini Episode, Nicole is sharing what she calls her “Stuck Strategies” that can be a trap for many entrepreneurs. These are the things that keep you playing small, stuck in your conditioning and ultimately sabotage your results.
A question she asks when working with clients is “What do you want?” and more times than not, they can’t answer it confidently and clearly. Only once you know what you want can you get it, so she’ll discuss how our human design can guide us to tackle that question and break through to clarity, alignment, and the results you are looking for.
Find out more about the brand new membership community for Human Design enthusiasts. A space I’ve carefully curated to give you EVERYTHING you need to accelerate your understanding of Human Design and take daily action to become the most authentic, unshakeable you. Find out more and sign up now at nicolelaino.com/lab.
We’d love to have you join the new Facebook Group, Human Design for Entrepreneurs so be sure to visit nicolelaino.com/podcastlinks to sign up and grab the free productivity and deconditioning guide while you are there.
Don’t forget to enter our monthly contest where you can win your own mini reading/coaching session on the show! Leave a review for the show, take a screenshot of the review, share it on Instagram and tag @nicolelainoofficial and you’re in the drawing.
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Interested in learning more about working with me? Click here to learn more about how we can work together.
Hello and welcome to the Limitless Entrepreneur Podcast everyone. I’m your host, Nicole Laino, and we are here today to talk about the, this question is something that, it often strikes me how when I ask entrepreneurs this question, they often don’t have the answer or they have a really vague answer, and I wanna talk a little bit about why that happens and why it’s such a problem and why it’s a question that you do need to answer.
So, When people come into my world, when I start coaching with them, the first question that I ask, and certainly right now, it’s the beginning of the year. This is the first question that I’ve asked everybody in my program, no matter whether they just entered, we had some new people join us over December, January or if they’ve been with me for a very long time.
I’m asking everybody the same question. It is sort of goal oriented, but I’m asking it in a very pointed way, and for some reason when we ask it this way, people just go, Ugh, I don’t know. But when I ask you what your goals are, you might have like things that you start to pick off, right? But if I ask you this one question, and I’m asking you right now, listening to this, do you know the answer?
What do you want? What do you want. That’s the question. That’s the question that no one can seem to answer, or very few people can not in a fluid way. They often get stuck on this, and I giggle because I’m sort of expecting it now, but it’s the most important question for you to ask yourself is what do you want?
And to get more and more specific about what you want. Now true, there are some aspects to, this is a show where we talk a lot about human design. So I wanna talk about the nuances there, which is why it is so beneficial to work with a human design coach because we can look at you for who you are and see why you might have problems answering specific questions or getting specific on certain things.
Now if you have a if, if you are more of a right focused person, and if you haven’t listened to the our episode on what the arrows in your human design chart mean, we go into detail about it there. But that bottom right arrow, if you have that pointing to the right, then you might have a hard time getting specific about things or holding the specifics.
If you have an open G center, you might have a hard time holding the specifics here. But it’s important for you to at least conjure up the feeling, conjure up, know exactly where you wanna go, what do you wanna feel like? How do you wanna live? What’s your ultimate goal and how can you get more specific about it?
So when I’m talking about what do you want, you know, start asking yourself good questions about what type of business do you want to have? What type of life do you wanna live? How do you want your world to look? How do you wanna feel? And that starts to tell you whether goals are correct or not. And we went into a little bit of this when we talked about the word of the year, but this is just, I wanna get really specific about this.
If you don’t know what you want, what happens is, and this is the big trap for entrepreneurs, what happens is when you don’t know what you want, you start to get freaked out that you haven’t done enough and you start to just do busy work and you start to just do things that aren’t in service to anything really.
You’re not pointed anywhere. It’s like you’re firing arrows at a target that doesn’t exist or you don’t know where it is, and you’re just shooting them blindly into the darkness. And what are you doing? You’re just using up all of your arrows. You’re using up all of your ammo. It’s just gonna be gone.
And then when you do, when someone turns the lights on and when you can see the target, you’ve got nothing left. You’re burnt out, you’re tapped out, and this happens. I see this happen over and over and over again. You have to remind yourself of where you want to go because you’ll manifest and think you have problems that you don’t have because you’re gonna say like, oh, this strategy isn’t working, this thing isn’t working, because it’s not actually being deployed in service to an actual goal in service to something that actually gets you to what you want.
Cuz you don’t know what you want. If you don’t know what you want, you’ll never get it. Because it’s always going to be this vague thing and everything is gonna feel like it falls short of this non-existent vision that you have. I thought I’d be further, what does that mean? Further along, but closer to what? I Thought it’d be further by [00:05:00] now.
Now it might be financial freedom, it might be, might start with something vague like that, but what does that mean to you? What does that mean to you? Because financial freedom, making more money doesn’t necessarily mean financial freedom. Making more money doesn’t necessarily mean that you are happy. How do you wanna make more money?
It’s so important that you’re able to envision what you want in life, cuz then you can start to, you can change the vision. What I see happen so often with people is that they’re so afraid to say what they want, because they’re afraid that they can’t have it, that they can’t get it. So it’s almost like if I don’t declare it, then I can’t be disappointed.
And this is a huge conditioning element. This is a huge way of this is, this is part of my, I call them stuck strategies. They’re ways that we stay stuck, and this would fall into the category of playing small. . Well, I’m not going to declare what I want. I’m not gonna really say what I want because maybe I won’t get it.
So I’m just gonna play it kind of safe back here and pretend like, because your subconscious is actually saying, let’s not really commit to going after this thing cuz we’re probably not going to get it. So that’s gonna give us the free pass to not really hit the gas. And this is why people stall. This is why you might be stuck wherever it is that you’re at.
You can be stuck at any level. You can be stuck at $0 and zero clients. You can be stuck at $50,000. You can be stuck at a hundred thousand. You can be stuck at a million. It depends on where you wanna go. If your goal is 5 million and you’re at 1 million and you’ve been there for two years, then you are stuck at 1 million.
It doesn’t sound terrible to be stuck there, but that person has their goals and we don’t know what else they have on their plate that the goal is five. So you can be stuck at any level. And playing small can happen at any level. Playing small means you’re playing small to your dream. It means that you are not fully committing everything that you have and something inside of you is holding you back.
And in this case, in this example, I’m saying that the fear that you can’t have what you want holds you back from ever taking real steps toward it. So if you are taking action right now and it feels like you are kind of firing bullets and they’re not hitting anything or you feel like you’re doing all the things, I hear this from people a lot.
I feel like I’m doing so much. I feel like I’m doing all the things, but I’m not actually seeing results from it. The truth is, is that you probably need to do less. You need to do less things overall. You need to do more of the right things, but you can’t figure out what those right things are until you know exactly what it is that you want and at least have an idea of where you want to go. And then you can start figuring out and how do I want to get there.
You know, how do I desire to make it to this destination? There are lots of ways to get there and that’s where you can start asking better questions and you can start building a business that supports you, that is sustainable, that supports your human design, where you’re not gonna experience resistance, but also supports the life that you want to live and the ways that’ll make you feel happiest and like your gifts are being used.
It isn’t just about doing more, it’s about doing more of the right things and taking time for yourself and nurturing yourself and your design. So we actually, we have a productivity guide, or I call it a flow-ductivity guide that will get you started with some of this stuff. So if you find that you don’t know what you want, I want you to, I want you to nail down something, tell me, you know, what do you want?
Write it down, look at it every day. Remind yourself of what you want, of where you are going. Declare it own it. And then download our free productivity guide, like I said, the flow-ductivity guide, because it’s gonna teach you how to be productive in flow. It’s gonna teach you how to ask some of those good questions.
How to use your human design specifically, it’s about human design, how to use your human design, your unique design to get more out of yourself without you actually having to work more. In fact, what you will most likely have, have an experience with is that you will work less and you will be able to get more done.
And who doesn’t want that? So download that free Guide’s. It’s totally free. You can get that at nicole.me/productivity. Or you can also, we have a second guide for you if you’re looking to Decondition, which is part of how you can let go of all of these strategies and conditioned ways of being that are holding you in the place that you are.
And causing you to make decisions and to be pulled off your own course of your authenticity and what is true and right and good for you. We have that, that we call that the deconditioning guide. You can decondition by your human design. We’ll show you some of the ways that you might be conditioned, where you might be pulled off course, so you can start to make little shifts that have big impact. You can download that at nicole.me/decondition. We’ll link all of this up in the show notes for you too. So if you need that link, you just pop on over there and we’ve got you covered. The last thing I wanna mention is that we are running a really cool contest.
Please, if you love this show and you would love to be on this show as a guest, I am actually giving away a free human design reading. So these are free mini readings. Where you’ll come on, you can either ask me a coaching question and we’ll work through it in your design, or if you wanna just see what I see in the design, you can come on, it’s really up to you how you wanna steer that. But if you wanna have a little human design coaching session with me on the show, all you have to do is leave a review for the show. It’s two steps. Leave a review up for the show on iTunes or Spotify or wherever you’re listening to your podcast. Leave a review, take a screenshot of that review and then put it in your instagram stories and tag me. I’m at Nicole Laino official. Tag me. We’re gonna pull those down. My team is gonna pull those down and we’re gonna keep track of everybody who submits, and then you will be entered in for a chance to win these readings. We’re gonna be doing these regularly.
So you have the chance to be entered anytime you put, after you do a review. Anytime that you add a screenshot saying that you loved an episode, you’ll also be able to be entered, have, have extra entries entered on your behalf to win that, to win that reading. So I hope that you join us because I would love to have you sit down with me for a little human design coaching session.
I absolutely love, love, love doing my human design readings and getting a chance to work people through their design and walk them through what might be holding them back and honestly, and then just the magic that unfolds after that. I would love to be able to do that with you right here on this show.
Plus you get to plug yourself and you get to promote yourself and tell everybody a little bit more about what you do to this audience here on the show. I hope you enter. I hope I get to sit down with you, and I hope you have a wonderful rest of your day. Now, remember, you are only limited by the limitations that you accept, and when you stop accepting those limitations, that is when you become limitless.
So go out there and be limitless, everyone. I’ll see you next time.