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Episode #138 The Empowered “No”

Today’s episode is a little dose of mindset goodness, something that is going to change your perspective to set you off into the week powerfully. Nicole will be talking about one of the most important words in your vocabulary as an entrepreneur and in your life. It’s your empowered “No”.

Regardless of your Human Design type, she’ll help you understand what an empowered “No” is, how to avoid decisions that don’t serve you, and how it frees up space for the next best yes.


Find out more about the brand new membership community for Human Design enthusiasts. A space I’ve carefully curated to give you EVERYTHING you need to accelerate your understanding of Human Design and take daily action to become the most authentic, unshakeable you. Find out more and sign up now at nicolelaino.com/lab.

We’d love to have you join the new Facebook Group, Human Design for Entrepreneurs so be sure to visit nicolelaino.com/podcastlinks to sign up and grab the free productivity and deconditioning guide while you are there.  

Don’t forget to enter our monthly contest where you can win your own mini reading/coaching session on the show! Leave a review for the show, take a screenshot of the review, share it on Instagram and tag @nicolelainoofficial and you’re in the drawing. 

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Hello and welcome to the Limitless Entrepreneur Podcast everyone. I’m your host, Nicole Laino. We are here together again for a little Monday episode, one of our little shorty episodes. We try to keep these short. Sometimes they go a little long on them, but only if they’re really, really good. but today this should be a short one.

These are episodes that are meant to set you up for your week, a little dose of mindset, goodness, something that is gonna change your perspective to set you off into the week, and that you can carry with you for weeks and weeks and weeks and forever and ever. So today we are gonna be talking about the one, arguably one of the most important words in your vocabulary as an entrepreneur and in your life.

Like this is just, this is a life skill. This is something that I want you to take in and I want you to be thinking about it all the time. And human design can give you the way to discern when to use this. The word I’m talking about, I’m gonna get to in just a second. First I wanna let you know about a couple of things that we have going on here.

Remember, we have our, our contest rolling right now, where if you’d like to get an HD reading with me on the show, come on this show, on the podcast, share your life, share who you are with our audience, get some visibility, but also get your chance to have some one-on-one time with me to dig into your human  design.

If that sounds good to you, all you have to do is go over to iTunes, leave us a review, tell everybody that you love the show, why you love it, what you love about it, and why they should listen too. Take a little screenshot of that review and paste it into your Instagram stories. And then tag me. I’m at Nicole Laino official.

My team will pull down that review and that will be your entry. You’re done. You’re all done. And we just let you know if you won when we pull the winner. We’ll be doing these every month. So keep this happening. We are always doing it and we’re just gonna keep pulling more and more winners.

We’re gonna do one a month and there’ll be one show a month dedicated to that. So if you’d like to be that, then that’s all you have to do. Two other things. We have two free guides for you. The free Guides are the Deconditioning Guide and the Human Design Flow-ductivity Guide. Both are human design. You can get the Deconditioning Guide, which is gonna help you to live more in alignment, very associated with this episode.

The Human Design Deconditioning Guide, you can get at nicolelaino.me/decondition. Or the flow-ductivity guide that’s really gonna tell you how to be productive while remaining in flow without necessarily adding more work to your schedule. But really just digging into what’s important for you and how you can use human design to get you there.

You can get that at nicolelaino.me/productivity and we’ll link every bit of that up in the show notes. So if you are confused about it, if you forget it, don’t worry. We’ve got you covered. Just hop on over to iTunes while you’re leaving that review and you can grab that information from the show notes.

Without further ado, let’s tell you what that word is, what we’re talking about here, and I’m talking about it in a very specific way. Now we’ve heard things. If you remember, there was a Jim Carey movie years ago called Yes Man. And the movie was all about how he said yes to everything, even if he didn’t want it.

Even if he didn’t like it. He just said yes. And it showed how it changed his life. And it’s true. Saying yes to things can change your life, but so can saying no. And what I’m talking about here is the empowered no. This is going to be for every HD type. There’s going to be a reason to say no. Now, if you are a manifestor, there’s going to be things that maybe seem like you could do them.

They’re going to seem like you maybe want to do a lot of things. But the empowered no is gonna be you knowing when to say no to those things that don’t feel like a true urge for you to move on. The empowered no is gonna be not saying no because you’re afraid. Not saying no out of lack, not saying no cuz you don’t have the money.

Not saying no because you don’t have the time. But, the empowered no is knowing that you followed your process and even though something might have looked good on paper, even though something might be a good idea, but it’s not right now for you. This happens all the time with my clients. And the reason I’m doing this episode is it came up very recently.

I had a client who’s looking for a job. This is not an entrepreneur. This is someone who’s looking for a job, and they got a job offer, and on paper it sounded great and in the past, they would’ve jumped on it. They would’ve jumped on the opportunity because it sounded perfect, but there was something internal that she was tapping into and it didn’t feel right.

So, she’s an emotional authority. So we waited and we were working together on this and I said, you know, checking in, what is your sacral saying? How do you feel emotionally? Where do you feel like you’re in your wave? And, and do you feel clear about this? And she thought she needed some more information.

So she went out and got more information about the job. and she waited and they wanted an answer and she told them that she needed more time. Not like, oh my God, apologizing for needing more time or feeling the pressure that she would’ve felt in the past to say something, yes or no. In that moment, when they ask her, does she have an answer for them?

No. She said no. She said, I need more time, and they said Ok and she stood her ground and she waited and she waited and she waited and she talked to some more people and found out that her instincts were correct. Her intuition was right, that something was not right about this position for her. And so she went back and she turned it down.

And because she turned it down from a place of such empowerment, because it was a no from a place of like, I know this is not right for me even though it might solve a problem that I have in the immediate future, it might be okay for now. That’s what she’d done in the past and gotten into job after job after job that was fulfilling for her.

That made her feel like one I, I gotta get outta here was the next one. This is a pattern. This is how we have these patterns where we’re not living in alignment with what we truly want or how we wanna. live. This is how it happens and this is how we break them. That we stop following what we should do.

We stop paying attention to that and we give the empowered yes or the empowered no, but the empowered no can be really hard [00:06:40] because it can feel like this world, especially with marketing, especially with financial needs that we have and the state of things right now. There’s a lot of fear and there’s a lot of pushing people’s buttons and triggering people on purpose to make them do what you wanna do.

There’s a lot of marketing out there that’s not very much in integrity and it can push people into their not self. That’s how you sell. I can teach you how to sell, selling to the not self. There’s also a way to do it with integrity. There’s a way to do it without hurting people.

And unfortunately there are a lot of people out there that are preying on people’s patterns that are not healthy for them. So it’s important for you to understand how to find your empowered no projectors, what invitations are not correct for you. manifesting generators and generators, what are you not responding to and still moving on. That’s gonna send you into burnout, that’s gonna send you into frustration and you’re not self theme. And that’s where you’re gonna notice that everything stops in your business and you can’t move. Nothing seems to work because the frustration feeds the frustration, feeds the frustration.

Now you’re in the energy of frustration. Now that’s what you’re attracting and that’s what changes everything in the way that you work. That’s what makes everything harder than it needs to be.

For projectors. You’re going to be in bitterness, you’re gonna be doing things and when you’re not saying no, when you’re not using the empowered.

When you’re not looking at something and saying, I know the next invitation is coming, the one that’s correct for me, I know this is wrong for me. When we’re saying yes outta desperation, when we’re saying yes out of lack, when we’re saying yes, because as a projector, maybe you’re feeling like I haven’t been recognized.

Someone’s recognizing me. I have to say yes to this. I want you to think back to your life, where have you said yes to something that you really, that really wasn’t right for you, but you said yes because either you needed the money, you, you needed the line on your resume. You needed something from it, even though you knew it wasn’t right, you said yes.

And how did that work out for me? I have a million times where I have done this in the past and certainly as a five one, where I wanted to be recognized, where I accepted the role of Savior that someone was giving me because I so desperately wanted to be accepted and so desperately wanted to be recognized for what I could do and said yes to the wrong things, to the wrong people, and that didn’t work out very well.

I would never wanna relive those experiences. So the empowered no would’ve been, not only do we say no in that moment and not put our energy and our time and ourselves into things that are not correct for us, but by the empowered, no, not just saying no, but the empowered no is I’m still in the energy of, I know that I said no to that and by saying no, I created space for the correct, yes.

And nine times outta 10, I mean almost all the time. If you stay in the energy of it, the next yes comes in, you said no to that, and now you just cleared out the space for something brilliant to come through, but it can’t come through because if you say yes to the wrong thing, the empowered no not only frees you up to accept something else, to have the space to accept something.

But it also allows you that empowered feeling is aligning your energy to I said no for a good reason. I said no, because I am waiting for my correct yes, I’m waiting for my hell yes. And we all have that.

Reflectors. You haven’t waited it out. You don’t know if that is your energy. You don’t know if it’s your time.

You work on your time. You don’t say yes cuz someone else tells you it’s their time. You say yes because it’s your time and you say no until then. All of it. Empowerment is the key. The empowered no. I’m gonna leave it there. I hope you found this useful. I hope you found it helpful, as I hope you find all of these episodes helpful.

If you’re loving the show, please leave a review, enter that contest. I would love to have you on the show and get to dig into your design with you. If you don’t wanna enter the contest and you just wanna send me a DM on Instagram to let me know what you think of the show, or you just wanna share this episode and say how this struck you or what this tuned you in to, I would love to hear that as well. Please tag me so that I see those posts. 

Now remember, you’re only limited by the limitations that you accept, and when you stop accepting those limitations, that is when you become limitless, everyone. So go out there and be limitless, my people. I’ll see you in the next one.

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