Episode 445:

Hello and welcome to Unshakable with Human Design. I’m your host, Nicole Laino. And today this episode is going to be for the generators and manifesting generators. Anybody with a sacral center defined. Now, that doesn’t mean if you are a projector or reflector or a manifestor, that you can’t get value out of this too. Because really what I’m going to do in this episode is I want to break down exactly how it really works to work with human design and work with it in your business. And we’re going to do a little bit of myth busting in here. 

We’re going to. I’m going to be showing you. This is sort of a case study of sorts that I. This is an example that came from a client where I worked her through something, through having her chart up on my screen, listening to her and hearing the not self. And anybody can do that. We’re just going to use a generator as an example today. But this will go for any. We’re really going to talk about, you know, how we get pulled off our path. So this will be valuable for everyone. But the exact example is going to be with a generator. So sacrals will. Obviously, this will be most like your own process. Okay, so this is really for everybody who ever says, like, I wish I could be more consistent, or you think you can’t be consistent. 

That was what my client came to me with. She was like, I can’t be consistent. Maybe I’m just not a disciplined person. And she was starting to get a lot of doubt about herself. She was starting to feel like things weren’t going to work. And this happens a lot, right? You know, entrepreneurship is a. I work with mostly entrepreneurs. It’s not exclusive, but mostly it’s entrepreneurs. And this is a bumpy ride. The first thing I have to do with everybody, I don’t care what your design is we have to redefine what consistency looks like, what it is. We have an idea about something that is not totally correct. And then we start to try to become this, like, perfected version that we have in our heads. And that in and of itself is conditioning. 

Someone told us along the way, and we’re all unwinding by the way, from the conditioning of Certainly the last 20 years or longer than that. Goodness, I’m old. We’re in 2026. So if we go back, you know, to the 80s, the 1980s, it was like, you know, like hustle and grind. And that was the big badge of honor. And now we’re shifting into a new paradigm where that is not getting us. That’s not a guarantee that you’re going to get what you want, and it is kind of a guarantee that you’re going to feel badly about yourself at some point, which is going to be far more damaging than whatever productivity you think you missed out on, you know? You know, consistency comes from a consistency in your energy first. 

So first, what we’re going to do is like, I want to clarify that we are not, like, diagnosing your personality here. We’re not talking about whether you are a successful person or not. What I’m going to do in this episode is kind of identify a mechanism and a system within human design that helps you self diagnose if you’re doing this yourself or understand why human design is. Is such a powerful tool for coaching, whether it be you doing this for your clients or you looking to hire somebody who is at least human design literate and can spot these things so that you’re being guided to your path to consistency and not somebody else’s. Okay, So I often struggle trying to explain exactly how human design connects with business growth, and I do a pretty good job of it. 

But I thought that this would be cool to go into an actual example of what I worked through with this particular client. I’m not going to give any names, of course. We’re anonymizing this whole thing. I’m not going to give you exactly what she was struggling with, but it was basically, she was like, I feel like maybe I’m just an undisciplined person. I feel like I’m not consistent. I feel like I can’t stay motivated. I can’t stay focused. Now, there can be so many factors in here, but we’re going to focus on, you know, one key path that went through. Okay. I’ll give you a little bonus at the end for other things that it could be that might be in your chart and then some resources for you. 

All right, so before we get into the episode, I did want to let you guys know we just launched something really exciting. It’s called the Human Design Authority Lab. This is like a human design gym for you and your business. It is super accessible it has monthly masterclasses with me, co working sessions with my team. You know, a community of people who are doing this is honestly one of the most beneficial things in human design is hearing other people talk about what they’re going through, seeing what they’re doing, seeing them get coached, seeing them work through it. You start to get so much clarity just from that conversation. So you get that and so much more. This is a monthly membership. There are no contracts at this time. You can join us for a month, you can join us for a year. 

Just give us 30 days notice and you cancel. So if you want to get in on that, this is the most affordable. We really wanted to make this accessible. But the whole point is getting you into action. How can you create your version of consistency in alignment with who you are so that you’re doing what is needed? And I think just becoming more and more of an emphasis of what we need to focus on in this climate in 2026 and where we are going and what we are seeing in the market, in this phenomenon that we’re experiencing now, which is that people don’t trust as easily as they used to, that copy isn’t carrying the weight that it used to. People are going, well, tell me more about that. They want to have more interaction with you. Why? 

Because they’re trying to feel into are you authentic? Are you the real deal? Because I’ve kissed a lot of frogs and I haven’t met my prince yet. So being authentic and knowing what is authentic to you, what’s your authentic voice? I had a client yesterday, tell me something inside one of our groups where she started to recite exactly what her human design nodes were for her niche. And she didn’t even know she was doing it. It was just because she started to be in relationship to all of this. She started to be coached in it and it’s starting to click and she’s doing it without thinking about it. That is so exciting. And that’s how you know, oh my God. That’s why I’m here. That’s why I’m on this path. That’s why I made all these turns to get to this point. 

It’s super exciting and I want everyone to experience it. I don’t want anyone saying like, oh, I can’t afford it. Everybody can afford this. So if you want to know more about it, go to nicolelaino.com lab. You can get information there. Or you can go to Instagram. DM me the word lab on Instagram. I’m @nicolelainoofficial and we’ll send you the information there. We kick officially on February 1st. If you join earlier, you might get in on our pre sale prices. But this is where we have founding member pricing. If you are getting this around the time that this episode airs. Okay, cool, cool. I hope to see you inside. All right. So, you know, most people say something like this, especially when I meet them. They’ll say something like, I’m inconsistent, I can’t follow through, I’m not disciplined. And they really are. 

We have a NEW HD membership community!! It is all about creating alignment, action, and consistency in your business with Human Design. To join The HD Authority Lab at the special pre-sale rate click the link here orDM Nicole “Lab” on Instagram for info.

These are people who are doing a lot, but the thing is that they’re not getting a lot of results from it. So they are starting to question their abilities and whether they’re doing. Usually it goes into am I doing enough? Rather than saying, am I in the right energy? Am I approaching this correctly? Right. And a lot of people will tell me that I get excited and then I drop it and then they question. These are sacrals I’m talking about right now. I got excited, I thought I was in alignment. I did the thing, I don’t want to do it anymore. What did I do wrong? I thought I did this right. I thought I made the decision. Right. Right. And this was sort of what was coming through with this client. Okay. And like, maybe you’ve done before. 

She was starting to say, like, maybe I need a better routine. Maybe I need more accountability. I think I just need to like connect with more people. And sometimes there are those things that will help, but that’s not the root of the problem. It’s sort of like attacking a root cause with a symptom solution. And, and so it might give you momentary success, but it’s not going to give you lasting success. You didn’t really get to the heart of it. You just attacked the symptom. You attacked the fact that you’re congested, but you didn’t really get to the fact that it’s a bacterial infection and you need to kill the bacterial infection. Right. That’s still going. So it keeps coming back in some way. And human design, what it does, it can course correct you. Right. So most people don’t need a better plan. 

They need to make decisions not from their not self. That’s usually the problem is that the not self is coming in and making the decision and the not self won’t stick around and continue for you there. Okay. That’s not going to stay. That’s not going to provide the sustainability. Okay. So when you’re a sacral, our magic is that we have sustainable energy. We can Go and go and go. That’s provided that there is response. If there’s no response, we don’t get to go and go and go. So if you make a decision not from your response, not from that place, not from your alignment, and you make a decision from your not self, you will not get that sustainability. 

So with this client, what she was talking about, I was looking at her chart and this particular client happened to have an open root center and then she also had an open head center. And so we started to talk about what these things are. I’m looking for openness in the chart. I’m looking for specific shadow patterns in the chart based on the person. This is why sometimes it can be difficult to discuss or explain human design in like this very specific way because it is so different based on everybody’s chart. It’s not always the root center because you might not have an out of alignment root center. It might be the emotional system for you, it might be the ego for you, it might be something else. Right? So this based on this person. 

What I was looking for was, and I asked her, I was like, you know, tell me how you ended up here. Because what’s actually happening, a lot of times the real pattern that’s going on is that a lot of times mental decision making is replacing sacral response. We’re thinking through things. Oh actually this client has a defined head, so she’s thinking all the time. And it was an undefined route, right? So the decision, if it’s made from thinking, I don’t care whether you have definition or not up there. Human design teaches us that the mind is not for decisions. The mind is a tool for inspiration. It is a tool to make, to come up with ideas, to have opinions, to have insights, to form realizations, rationalizations, to come up with all of these cool theories and things like that. 

But it’s not here to decide. It’s not here to decide. And no matter what, if we get caught in thinking, if you have a defined head, that’s going to be pressure all the time. And if you have an undefined head, that’s going to be mental pressure that’s coming from the outside world maybe where maybe somebody else told you should care about something and you’ve become obsessed about caring about that thing and has absolutely no bearing on your life. So it’s distracting you from what is your correct path, right? So what happens is if a decision is made. So like for her open route, the open root center Always feels like you’re running out of time. This is also pressure. It’s adrenalized pressure. So what’s normally happening here is somebody experiences pressure from something in their life, right. I need to make payroll this month. 

I’m running out of time. I’m feeling like I don’t have the answer. I don’t know what strategy I’m going to use. So there’s anxiety that comes up with that, which can be emotional. But that pressure to figure something out, to do something is so uncomfortable. The mind kicks in and says, this sucks. This is really uncomfortable. We’ve got to do something now because for most of us it feels more comfortable to do something than to not do something. So we pick something and we try to do something. And if you’re a sacral, you have energy. If you’re a sacral, your sacral motor will run for a bit. It’s still there, but you won’t get the sustainability from it. So a lot of sacrals that come to me and say, I don’t feel like a generator, I feel more like a projector. 

My first question to them is asking them, well, what are you doing? Tell me about what you’re doing. Because that’s not normal. It’s like a doctor if a 17 year old comes in and says that they’re sleepy all the time and they have no energy and they feel fatigue, that’s not normal for a teenager to feel who’s getting a good night’s sleep. Tell me about what you’re doing, what are you eating? That’s the same thing. It’s not normal for a sacral to feel like they don’t have any energy or to feel like they can’t stay with things. You have to go back to the beginning. You have to go back to like, well, tell me how you got to this place where you’re doing this thing. 

And I want you to be in response to the thing right now and see if you have energy for it. Now it’s not a thought, it’s a feeling, it’s an engine kicking on. So when we get into one of these pressure situations, what often happens is that the mind kicks in, says, pick something. Now we take action to reduce that feeling of pressure that feels so uncomfortable to us. We just need to get rid of it. So we do something. So we override the sacral response. And we are taking action from pressure. And if it’s openness, we’re taking action from an open place, which is the not self. That’s not Us, that’s not our power, that’s not our thing. That is our feeling of I can’t control this and the only thing I can do to control it is do something. 

So I’m going to take action. I’m not going to wait for my sacral to respond because I’m not even thinking about that. I’m not grounded, I’m ungrounded. So I’m making a decision from a place of fear and discomfort rather than from groundedness and power. I always say the not self, anything that is not your power and not your strategy and authority is the tail wagging the dog. The dog is your strategy and authority, the dog is your definition. That is everything that you are here to put out. It’s what you’re here to trust all the time. The other stuff, you can’t trust it. You can’t trust something that’s open because it might be on for a bit and then it’s gone. Can’t trust it. Not sustainable. Might not be there the next time you go looking for it, right? 

Might be there for a good time. Sort of like if you had, if you wanted to date this person that you knew was super unreliable, left town, totally like ditched you lots of times. She sure, if the sex is great and you want to have a great time for a night and have it be nothing more than that, by all means, have at it. But don’t expect the ring to pop out. Don’t be thinking about a forever together. That’s what it’s like going into business with your not self. You cannot count on it and it is not you and it’s not your genius and it’s not your magic. So you’re not going to be attracting and magnetizing the way that we want to. And we want to use our energy to draw in the things that are correct for us, right? 

So sacral, when your sacral isn’t in because it was never asked, pressure made that decision. Sacral did not. So now your sacral is not in on that decision. Your energy will drop and now your interest disappears. Because the life force energy that creates sustainable momentum and consistency for you, which is going to create consistency for you in that project. It’s also going to create consistency for you in your life. Because the sacral is the thing that gives you a good night’s sleep, that allows you to wake up the next day and feel energized, to hit the day again, to be clear in your mind, because that is the source of all of your vitality. Comes from the sacral. If it’s run down, and I’ve said this before on the show a million times, but I’ll say it again. 

If you’re doing something that the sacral is turned on for, it will go and go and go for you. If you’re doing something that sacral either said no to flat out or was not asked, so nobody ever turned it on, what you’re going to do is you’re going to drain that sustainable battery that you have. It’s going to pull more energy. It’s like if you left the lights on in your car, so the car wasn’t running, but you still left like the lights on, you left like the light, interior light on in your car. So when you went outside to start it the next day it wouldn’t start. And you’re like, I didn’t even drive it. I didn’t even do anything. What’s going on? It was just sitting here. Yeah, but you left something on that was pulling energy from it. 

That’s like what it’s like when you are working on something without sacral buy in, with. Without sacral buy in, you are draining your battery and this is where you will become tired. This is where you will not be energized by your work. And when you start questioning everything, here’s what happens, here’s the pattern that happens. Now you start questioning things now in your mind. You go to your mind again because now you’re scared. It didn’t work. I don’t know. Now you’re back in your head again. Now you’re really not making decisions from your power. Now you’re in your head. Now the mind is winning. Now I don’t see the mind as the enemy. 

I don’t see the mind as like this sinister thing, but it does like control because we’ve given it control and it’s used to having control and it doesn’t want to give it back. Your brain wants to take over. This is what keeps you in a state of stress. And this is why when something isn’t working, you immediately go to your thoughts to try to figure out, well, what’s the next thing that I can do? So this is like there’s so much to this, but this is how this creates a pattern with people that never seems to end. And it usually makes you feel really disempowered. So this is how we start to unwind this stuff. Like as I was talking to this particular client, I was explaining this to her and she’s like, okay, this is really making a lot of sense. 

When we work with human design, what we’re really doing is we’re learning a new way to relate to ourselves and our situation. Instead of looking at the outside world and then making a criticism of ourselves for being or, you know, rewarding ourselves even for, you know, being good or not good at something instead of that, it gets us checking in with ourselves inwardly. That didn’t work. Where did that come from? How am I feeling about this? It’s changing the way that your nervous system is relating to your situation. Because this is the other thing that, you know, I think a lot of high level entrepreneurs understand this. 

I know a lot of energy people understand this, but feel like there’s still a disconnect between the practical application of how your nervous system is showing up in your business versus, like theorizing about it on podcasts. Even like this survival mode. When you’re in survival mode, and that can be, you know, that can have a range. Survival mode could be, you know, I’m running out of money, or it could just be like, you know, I can feel it where I shift into anxiety, where I’ll be like, oh, I’m not going to hit the same number that I did last month and I have to let go of that. But anything that causes you to have fear or anxiety or worry about your survival or, you know, and your survival could just be that your income dropped, doesn’t have to be that there is none. 

Anything that puts you into a state of fear. But when you’re in survival mode, what it does is usually make you chase certainty. And that’s why clarity becomes like a coping strategy. I’m looking for answers. I’m looking for answers. I’m looking for answers. 70% of the world has an undefined head center. So looking for answers is a real trap for those of us who have that. One way that I have dealt with having an open head and needing answers is through coaching. Hiring my own coaches, hiring really good ones that I trust. I can’t say I always get that right. I do my best, but the people that I invest with, who can give me their experience, their processes, their resources for me to interact with, calms me down. Where I’m like, okay, I can get what I need when I need it. 

I’m not thinking about that stuff. It stops that chatter and that spinning in my brain of like, what am I going to do and how am I going to do it? I don’t chase clarity anymore. It’s like okay, I could go and I can dip into resources if I need them. It sets me at ease. An at ease nervous system or regulated nervous system is what allows me to make decisions from my sacral because if I am triggered then I won’t be able to be brilliant in that state. I can’t be grounded and I can’t make decisions from the correct place because fear takes over. Okay, so this is why, you know, when we force these decisions, it’s temporary relief, but it’s long term instability and it’s a cycle that keeps continuing because then we get scared again. 

It doesn’t work, we question ourselves and now we’re triggered again. So having tools to first of all be able to come back to safety and be able to ground yourself in something that feels solid in your own body is not an option. It’s required at this point. So if were to break this down in steps for how to come back, it is to remove the urgency, to kind of get. You have to be able to take a pause. If you are reactive, then you are going to continue to make decisions from your not self. If you’re reactive then you know, whether you have bridging gates or you have open centers or whatever your human design map is telling you about what your kind of incorrect decision making pattern might be. If you have an open solar plexus, it might be like to avoid confrontation. 

It might be like this is going to be uncomfortable, so I’m just going to avoid that. And it’s shhh. Showing you something. The chart provides a map. But this urgency where you’re not deciding from panic, that you’re not deciding from disempowerment. Because when we create or move out of lack, take action out of lack, we get more lack. So the first step is that you really have to break this down and come back to a place of safety. That’s step two. So the first step is to remove that urgency. Because the truth is that in this moment, unless you are mortally wounded, I know it might feel like things are bad. Maybe you’re worried about whether you can pay your bills, maybe you’re worried about whether your relationship will be okay. 

Whatever it is that’s worrying you, it isn’t happening right in this very moment. There’s not mortal danger in this very moment. So if you can come back to that. One of my favorite books by Ram Dass, it’s called Be Here Now. And this is why meditation, visualization, all of these things, breath work, bring you back to the present moment. And why that’s so powerful is that no matter what is happening in your world, how bad it is in this very moment, right now, I’m okay. So that first step is to just remember that. So even if like the stress is that, you know, it isn’t working, that might be tomorrow, that might be the next day. There’s always something. But right now, I’m okay, I’m breathing, I have air in my lungs. I’m here. I’m grateful. 

Like, can you come back to that place and restore safety? Restore safety in some way? Because truthfully, what usually happens is, you know, we’re restoring safety by like, you know, permission to stop feeling like you need to be consistent. Can you take one action now? Can you do one thing now? I always say that if it has to do with money, usually the reason that we’re not making money is that we’re not asking for it. We’re not asking for the sale enough. We aren’t being open enough about it. If you want to make more sales, ask for the sale more. That is a really age old marketing and sales saying, and it is for a reason. And I don’t care what your design is, you can always send an email saying, I’ve got this thing. Here’s the link. 

If you want to buy it, you could drop a story on Instagram that says, hey, I’m doing this cool thing. You want to get in? DM me this word. You can do all of that and you can start to feel successful again. We don’t want success to come from the outside world. But the reality is sometimes we need to show ourselves that we are in more control of it. And it isn’t about necessarily taking massive action over days and days and weeks and weeks and doing the same thing over and over again. That feels impossible. So we want to restore that safety. Take one action that could lead to something good, to something that you want, show yourself success as possible, and then return to response. 

So what response really looks like is wait for your body to give you a signal about something and you have to start to figure out how you can engineer that. So if you have something that you’ve been trying to do and it’s not working, first of all, ask yourself, why do I want to do this thing? Why do I feel like I need to do this? Why does this feel like something that must be done? Because a lot of times there’s things we think we have to do and we just don’t. Someone told us to do it. It sounded like a good idea. Somebody else was doing it. So we decided that were going to try it. But it really wasn’t something that was our choice. So let it go. But be in relationship to the thing and wait for it. 

Like look at it. Be like, do I want to do this right now? Yes or no? Feel if your body kicks on. Feel if your body says yes. Feel if your body is giving you any indication that this seems fun. And the other thing I would do is let’s just pay attention to what your sacral does respond to. You know, you can go out and you could do something that just is totally fun. I say like the simple things could be a walk. It could be drive with the windows down on a beautiful day, playing your favorite music, dancing. Simple things that just make you where you at least feel what it feels like for your sacral to turn on you to know what that motor feels like. We’ve all experienced it. 

If you’re a sacral that’s walked around just never having their sacral on, of course it is. It’s just, it’s happening when you’re like roller skating or doing something exciting and fun. And it does happen when we work. It just doesn’t happen when we do every single thing in our business at the time that we scheduled it for. So you have to ask yourself, do I not want to do this now or do I not want to do this at all? Is there something else I could do that feels better? And then be in response to that. Go have a conversation with somebody and see what comes out of that conversation. See if you start to get excited about something, have them ask you questions about the thing that you’re doing. But release your idea of what consistency needs to look like. 

I think this is really important because when you get into this cycle, this can really cause a lot of self judgment and we can lose confidence and that is going to have some long term negative effects. So really what you want to do is redefine what consistency is. I create a lot of space on my calendar now for joy, for me to do what I want. And sometimes it’s just to do nothing. And that feels like the best. But what happens there? Because I’m giving my sacral what I want, what it wants, I’m able to go. And because my motor is kind of on most of the time when I go to do something else, it’s like, yeah, sure, I’ll do that. You guys, if you’ve been listening to the show for a Long time. 

You know, you’ve probably heard me use this analogy before, but if I asked my husband to go to the mall, if I was like, can you come with me to Sephora? And then I want to go try some clothes on in Nordstrom for a while and. And then I was going to stop at Anina Bing and I just had this whole thing where I was like, I want to do all of this stuff. My husband would be like, I want to die. You should go by yourself. I don’t want any part of this. And if I made him go, he’d be sulking and he would probably ruin it for both of us, to tell you the truth. He would just be like, are you done yet? Are you done yet? Are you done yet? And I’d be like, fine, I’m done. 

Okay, we can go home now. He’d be like, I’ll go get the car. That’s his move. I’m gonna go get the car. I’m gonna bring the car around. Because he’s like, I can’t be here anymore, right? But if I were to take him to the guitar shop and buy him a guitar and watch him play it and I did his thing for a while and then he’s in such a good mood and feels so grateful and is having such a great time and I let him keep the guitar and take it with us and he’ll be like, you want to come? I’m just going to go into this store for a bit. You could sit outside with your guitar. You’d be like, cool. Take all the time you need. Keep playing. That’s your sacral. Give it what it wants. 

Romance it a bit, give it some energy, get it on, turn it on. It’s a turn on motor. That’s what it’s about. Most people are not turning it on and pay attention. Are you making decisions from not your power. Whatever your openness is. If you have a small split, it’s going to be your bridging gates that you want to look out for the most. If you are most of the other types, it’s going to be your open centers is where you are going to have the trap of having decisions trying to be made from those places. I have an open G center. I need to be loved. I need people to like me. Maybe that’s causing you to feel like you need to be on social media all the time and. And to get people to like you. 

And when you put something up and they don’t like you, that feels very personal to you. So it Breaks your heart a bit. Now you don’t want to show up there anymore. It can’t be for that. It has to be for something else. So making content from that place, not going to work to be liked, not going to work, but making content. Because you are so into this topic, into this thing that you are in response to, into this thing, like you’re just like, oh, I need to talk about this. And social media just becomes a place that you put it. Now you’ll have absolutely no problem seeing that through. That’ll take you 10 minutes to write. It’ll beautiful. You’ll probably get the best engagement that you get on anything else because it came from this true place. 

And it will feel like, oh, I want to do it again because now it’ll be fun. Big, big difference. This is how you create from alignment, in alignment with your design. And that is the first way is how you create and drive yourself into a whole from your not self. All of this is what we are covering in the Human Design Authority Lab. It’s all going to be about putting yourself out there and being seen as an authority by you. Just being in alignment with who you are and actually putting it into action. How can we create consistency that looks right for you, where you get to be visible, but you’re visible for being you and you’re taking action and you’re doing this and you’re getting into your rhythm of taking action from a truly aligned place. That is the mandate for this membership. 

If you’re interested in that, no matter what design you are, we cover you all, we serve you all. All you have to do to find out more is go to nicolelaino.com lab or go to Instagram. I’m @nicolelainoofficial and DM me the word lab and we’ll send you the details there. This is super cheap. Nobody should be saying that they can’t afford this offer. We made this incredibly accessible and prices will go up as time goes on because this is only going to get more and more valuable because every month I’m doing a specific masterclass just, you know, right inside that group that is going to be added to the membership. And so six months from now, there’ll be six masterclasses in there. 

We have a NEW HD membership community!! It is all about creating alignment, action, and consistency in your business with Human Design. To join The HD Authority Lab at the special pre-sale rate click the link here orDM Nicole “Lab” on Instagram for info.

So now is the time to get in where you can get in for the lowest price and be on the journey with us and be aligned in no time. Okay. And taking action. All right. Hope to see you inside the lab. Super excited about this. I hope that we get to serve you in there now. Remember, in order to have an unshakable business, you must first become an unshakable human. So thanks for letting us help you become unshakable with human design. We’ll see you next time.