Episode 461:


Hello and welcome to Unshakable with Human Design. I’m your host, Nicole Laino, and I wanted to sit down with you, just the two of us today, it’s just us. And I really wanted to talk about this particular thing that I see with human design and business. So I’ve been speaking with so many people leading up to the expanded leader masterclass that we are actually dropping. If you’re listening to this on the day that this episode drops, then we are starting. So you can join us. Just DM me the word masterclass on Instagram. I’m @nicolelainoofficial and we will register you right there in the DMs or go to nicolelaino.com/masterclass, and you can register there and get all of the info. If you missed the first session, we’ll send you the replay link right away. 

To register for Nicole’s brand new FREE Masterclass – The Expanded Leader: How spiritually intelligent entrepreneurs become trusted voices, build platforms, and monetize their wisdom in the Authority Economy, go tonicolelaino.com/masterclass or DM Nicole “Masterclass” on Instagram

And if you get in before then you can join us for it live. It starts at noon Central time. So I’ve been talking with a lot of people. What I do is I host these connect calls and I offer people when you sign up to register for the master class. I love talking to people. I want to know whose butts are in those seats. Who am I speaking to specifically? Not just what I think, you know, my audience needs. I want to know where are you? What are you up to? What is your business? Like what. What made you sign up for this? So that I make sure that I’m delivering for the people who are actually there. And these calls are so valuable to me. One, I get to do something really cool, which is connect with the people. 

Who are going to be there. 

And so many of them are listeners to this show. I mean, pretty much all of them tell me that they found me through the podcast, which also tells me that this is how I know the things that I know. This is how I know where my money comes from. This is how I know where to put more effort and where maybe to put less effort. What actually driving not just revenue, but all sorts of results in my business. I get a sense of that from talking to people. So I’ve been talking to all of these people who are signed up for the masterclass, which I’m super grateful for their time And I’m noticing such a shift in the way that people are approaching this work in human design and business. And it’s very exciting for me because. 

And what’s also very exciting is that, like I said, they said that they’re listeners of this show, they are fans of the show, many of them saying that they, you know, they’re religious listeners. They listen every week when I drop my episodes. They’re always listening. And that means so much to me. But it’s also. It’s telling me something that. Because these people that are coming to my masterclass are hearing actually what I’m saying, that they have come along on the ride long enough with this work that they are starting to really get it. And they’re. What they’re starting to see. It’s this gap with human design business that I have been pointing out for years. And this is the gap that’s keeping them from the influence and the income that they are capable of having. 

There is this kind of fundamental problem with the way that people approach this. And what’s so exciting for me is to hear these people talking about how they are actually looking for the bridge between this gap, that they are actually identifying what they’re looking for. They’re telling me that what in my re. In my message, what’s resonating for them, is exactly what I hope would resonate for them. Not because it works for me, but because it’s the truth. And for the longest time, it felt like, will anybody ever really get this? Obviously, the clients who come into business by design and into other. Our other programs and stuff and other work with me, they get it. They’re investing in it. Will other people really get it? There’s always that question, you know, or will it remain at the surface? 

So in this episode, I’m going to break what this gap is down, and I’m going to explain it. I’m going to talk to you about, you know, how it’s getting in your way. Maybe you can identify if you are seeing this gap and you’re recognizing how to bridge that gap, which also. This is what we’re talking about in the masterclass. This masterclass, expanded leader masterclass is not like the authority accelerator masterclass. The expanded leader masterclass is an expanded conversation. This is an elevated conversation around, obviously, I still teach business, human design. How do we integrate these two things together? How do we make money doing the things that are in alignment with our purpose? That’s still the same. Like, my mission is still the same. But the way that I’m talking about it and how we are approaching this is very different. 

And so I’m very excited about this because this is the conversation I’ve wanted to have for a really long time, and we’re going to have it. So if you’re looking for you, listen to this episode and you’re like, that’s the gap that I want to fill. That’s the life I want to lead. That’s how I want to run my business. Then you should come to the masterclass, if you’re not already. So like I said. Nicolelaino.com masterclass, it’s all linked up in the show notes for you. If you’re not sure, click the link and then you can go register right there. Okay, so I’m going to break this whole thing down for you. So let’s do that, right? Let’s let’s dig into this, shall we? 

So, first of all, the big gap, the big problem that I see is that most people are using human design to figure themselves out, but they’re not using. That’s not what human design is for. It starts there, you know, I, I think it does, but that’s not ultimately what it’s for. That’s almost the trap. So they’re using it to figure themselves out, but they are not using it for what it truly is for, which is to lead themselves. Human design gives you a way of interacting with yourself and understanding yourself in a way that I don’t think anything else does, but not just so you can have answer when somebody asks you something about yourself, that you canswer it, that’s fine, but so you can actually, in the moment, you’re leading yourself from your truth, from your power, and not from your conditioning. 

That’s the thing. So this is the gap. Figuring yourself out, not leaving yourself with human design is the gap that is keeping entrepreneurs and a lot of people that I see small. It’s actually keeping them. So what they do is they can go into some obsessive kind of analysis of their design and that is actually keeping them from attracting the people that they want to attract from really connecting from their message, landing from them being able to be productive. All of this stuff is actually a byproduct of just approaching the human design work not from the right place, not in the correct way, not in a way that I don’t want to say correct, because, you know, everybody has their thing. But to me, it’s not an efficient way and it’s not an effective way. 

If you want to use this as Like a North Star in your business. If you want to really grow your business from a place of alignment, then that’s not the way to approach it. So when entrepreneurs use human design as a tool for certainty instead of a tool for self leadership, what they get is they get not what they’re looking for. What they end up doing is they’re always waiting for perfect alignment. They are. What I see is I’ll see people get trapped in human, know this is just how I am. You know, they’ll start to make excuses, use their design for reasons why they can’t do something, to lobby for their own limitations versus seeing some challenges as ways of molding them into exactly who they were meant to be. It’s okay to ask yourself, is this my ego talking? 

Is this something that, is this my conditioning or is this my truth? That’s a fine question to ask, but I see a lot of people get stuck in things like, you know, well, I’m an emotional authority, so I can’t do this. I’m a projector, so I can’t do this. And you probably heard me talk about this stuff on the show before because it’s the rules based kind of approach to human design. Doesn’t get us the results that we’re looking for. It isn’t about the rules, it’s about feeding yourself enough of the wisdom where you’re taking in and reacting to the world in a way that is giving you the right feedback where you know what your next move is from an aligned place. It’s funny, I’m taking a little detour here, but this just feels so right for me to talk about. 

I’m obsessed with the movie Hamnet. I thought it was incredibly beautiful. I watched it, I knew nothing about the director and her name is Chloe Zhao. I do know who she is now. She’s a Beijing born director. But I watched the movie and I said, a woman directed this. I know it in my bones that this was a female director and I did not know that at the time. But I was just watching and I was like, there is so much depth and feeling and emotion and rawness and femininity without it being femininity. It was just, I’m like, I can feel that a woman directed this. And then I found some interviews by her and I’m completely obsessed with her now, totally obsessed. And she was talking about the type of environment that she creates on her sets. 

And I’ve watched, I don’t even know how many interviews I’ve watched with her now. I can’t get enough of it. I’m completely obsessed with her and the way that she works. And she was talking about how she creates these containers and she would sometimes do a collective dream with all of the actors because she wanted to access the subconscious. And she talked about where she’s creating this container and they’re all in this collective dream. And. And then she’s like. And other directors were asking her. It was a kind of a roundtable of directors. And it was like, James Cameron, really accomplished, like, major directors. And she’s sitting in the middle and she’s talking about this very different approach that she has. And they’re asking her, they’re like, well, are you doing this collective dream about scene? 

And then trying to get them in a state where they’re understanding the scene. She’s like, it is something around it where there’s an essence that I want everybody to be in, but I want them to have their own experience with it. And I trust that a seed is planted there. And I don’t know if it will come out in the scene, but I trust that seed is doing what it needs to do and it will come out at the right time if we give it enough oxygen and we give it enough light and we give it enough space. And I, like, almost burst into tears hearing this, because that is the type of leader that I’m trying to become. And, you know, this woman had a big task, a big budget. She’s working with, she’s responsible for hundreds of people on a set. 

She’s responsible for the outcome of this movie, but she had such trust in the way that it would all come out, and she’s relying on other people to do their parts. And now Jessie Buckley, who won all of the best actress awards from all of the various different academies that were giving out awards this year, she won them all for her performance in Hamnet. It was so beautiful and so real and so true. As a former actor, I’m always so impressed by people who can just live the life and just really put you right there with them. And I thought that she did that the entire time. I was just so with her in the joy and the pain and all of it. If you haven’t seen the movie, I highly recommend that you do. It is extraordinary, in my opinion. 

But how did that performance. Yes, of course, Jessie Buckley is an incredibly talented actress, but she was also given the space and I’m interested to see her next role. She’s playing the bride in Maggie Gyllenhaal’s new movie. Again, female director. I want to see how this goes. But this. She was given the space to be raw. She was given the space to really experiment, because that was what Chloe Zhao kept talking about. She’s like, it’s an experiment. So she had so much trust. It wasn’t like nothing was riding on this. And the connection I want you to make here is that our businesses, there’s a lot riding on it. And I understand that. I understand that. But when we’re trapped in our mind and she was talking about this, she was like, I try not to have this come from a mental place. 

I try to have it come from my body. And one of the directors asked her, if a line doesn’t come right outright, or if an actor misses something or. Or something, do you call out the line? Do you have them redo it? Do you. You know, are you directing them through that? And she said, she’s like, if it comes from my body, then I will say it, but if it comes from my mind, I don’t. And I was, like, completely blown away. She’s definitely a generator. I don’t know if she’s a manifesting generator or a generator. I don’t have her birth time, so I can only run, like, a chart for the day and see. So her response, she’s like, only if it’s a real response is what she’s. If it comes from my body, I do. 

If it comes from my mind, I don’t. I could cry talking about this, because it’s like, this is what we all want to get to. This is feminine leadership at its best. She ended up being nominated for best director. Like, she told the story. She made the movie. It was spectacular. The end product was there, but she approached it from her heart and from her soul and from this feminine place where she didn’t just not do work one day because she didn’t feel like it. She didn’t argue for her limitations. She allowed what needed to be there to arise. I think is where we all want to go. And what I see happen when we’re trying to figure ourselves out, when entrepreneurs are trying to figure it out, it’s mental. 

And now we’re trapped in the mind, and it almost becomes worse than if you didn’t have this stuff altogether. Because that mental place is where we justify the inaction. We get caught in the, will it work? Won’t it work? We’re always looking for a right way before moving. We’re always looking for, is this gonna come out okay? And that was what made me think of her. I hadn’t planned on talking about her on this episode actually, but I kind of couldn’t help myself because I’m so steep now I’m gonna watch every movie she’s ever direct. Like I said, I’m completely obsessed with her. And I want us to hang out and drink tea and talk about like life in the subconscious and being on this physical plane, but that same spirit. 

And it sounded like it’s a conscious effort for her where she is consistently trying to stay out of the mental place and stay in her body. And she kept talking about, she’s like, it’s an embodiment of the container. And if you can take anything away from that is, you know that this whole dance that we’re doing with human design and it is a dance. Can you remember that? That this is a dance, that this is a way of relating to yourself that isn’t figuring it out is very like. It’s a masculine approach. And I get it. Human design can be a little masculine in the way that we talk about it. You know, it can feel very rules based. You have to respond, you have to wait for the invitation. Was that an invitation? I don’t know. Maybe I can I call people. 

I don’t know. It’s not an invitation. And I’m a projector. And we get stuck in that. That’s the first phase. And if you can get out of that first phase of like obsessively trying to figure everything out and move toward a place of really being able to start to contemplate. When we contemplate, that’s the seed. Can we respect that the seed was planted and just trust that the more we’re in our body that the seed will sprout into something? Because once you first discover human design, it feels like something finally explains you. And it’s this beautiful moment, but then the mind takes hold and this is like. Then we start to look for the answer. Can I find the answer here? We stop trusting our own voice. 

We start to filter ourselves and delay expressing ourselves, which is the opposite of what it’s meant to do. Human design isn’t something that you consult. It isn’t something that you are meant to work. It’s something you embody the truth of all the pieces and. And all the pieces are greater than the sum of their parts. They’re you. So it’s normal to intellectualize your design at first. I did. There’s no shame in the game. I’m never shaming you, but I am encouraging you to keep going if you’re stuck in that place and it’s not working. Because that’s. The approach is what’s keeping you small. The approach is what’s keeping you from really being able to progress with this. Human design was never meant to make decisions for you. It’s meant for you to help you trust yourself above everything else. 

Because when that’s missing, you’re on the same path that you’ve always been on. Not trusting, looking for answer. You’re just looking for it. It’s in a better place. You’re looking for it at least inside yourself, sort of. But if you’re looking to the system to tell you which rule to follow and whether it’s okay, then you’re kind of part of that same problem. It’s just a different way that you’re relating to it instead of asking yourself better questions and letting your design unfold. And then when you let your design unfold, new things unfold. And this is the magic that we want to create, we want to get to. I did an episode, the last episode I did on this show was about what your cosmic niche really is. Your cosmic niche is something that. 

It’s a way of you relating to the outside world, to the people that you’ve always known, to the people that you can help. And ultimately, it reveals your natural perspective. But that doesn’t happen. That doesn’t happen unless you are allowing the design to work through you. If you’re in that mental place, to quote R.A. of the way that he would put this, is if you’re not in alignment with your design, you will not see properly. You will not see what you are meant to see. Your perspective is part of your nodal composition. The cosmic niche, as I call it. That’s part of it, is your perspective. It’s what you see. It’s what you’re meant to see. When you’re seeing what you’re meant to see, you have a perspective that is worth something to other people. That is what you offer other people. 

My perspective of. I mean, there’s so many ways I could look at my perspective, but as I have gone on my journey, that perspective has evolved. That perspective has become clearer to me. That perspective has gotten honed over time as I have evolved. It’s one of compassion. It’s one of being able to see crisis and see it for what it is and to actually be able to relate to it in a different way. It’s the compassion that I see is the compassion that I’m able To offer every one of you to say that the way that you are designed is beautiful and that shadows are not something to be ashamed of it. It’s part of what I offer to people. Everything will be all right is part of that perspective. I get to hold that space for people. 

The way that I relate to my perspective has changed over time, but not because I’ve changed it mentally, because it’s just my relation to it has changed because I have evolved. That’s what this is about. Human design gives you an aligned way of you evolving over time, of bringing out the best of you. And when you follow your design, it shows you how you process and express your ideas. And this is how you become an actual embodied leader. It’s not about knowing your design, it’s about leading from it. And it starts with you leading yourself. Because you may have heard me say this before. You can’t be an authority to others until you are an authority, until to yourself. So I want to leave this here. 

I’m going to leave this episode here because I feel like I have said a lot and I want you to reflect on that. I would love for you to come to the Expanded Leader Masterclass. If this is the type of leader that you want to become, if you are ready to step into your next level of leadership, to evolve and have your evolution actually be part of your business plan. To be part of how you grow your business is to grow yourself, then you should be a part of this conversation, too. Go to nicolelaino.com/masterclass Sign up for that masterclass. It is free. We have really cool ways for you to stay in touch with it, too. We have, of course there are replays available, There always are. 

To register for Nicole’s brand new FREE Masterclass – The Expanded Leader: How spiritually intelligent entrepreneurs become trusted voices, build platforms, and monetize their wisdom in the Authority Economy, go tonicolelaino.com/masterclass or DM Nicole “Masterclass” on Instagram

But we also have a secret podcast set up, a private podcast set up where you can get it. You can listen to it if you want to on the private podcast feed, which is super cool. That way, if it’s not convenient for you to sit down and watch videos, you’re like, oh, I need to go for a walk or whatever. You can just pop your earbuds in just like you listen to my regular show. But we have a separate feed just for the masterclass, so you can listen to it there. So really cool ways that we’re kind of playing with, making it easier for everybody to stay up to date on time with the masterclass material. So I hope to see you there. Remember, in order to have an unshakeable business, you must first become an unshakeable human. 

To download the Secret Podcast on how to Build & Scale Your Business with Human Design click here: nicolelaino.com/secretpodcast 

So thanks for letting us help you become unshakable with human design. We’ll see you next time.