Today, Nicole tackles the intricate subject of self sabotage, examining it through the unique lens of Human Design’s “head center”. Many of us grapple with internal barriers, often without even realizing it. But what if the key to unlocking your potential lies in understanding a specific aspect of your design?
Nicole discusses the head center – both undefined/open and defined. She delves into the pitfalls associated with each; from the endless quest for newness and the “Shiny Object Syndrome” of the open center, to the rigid, unyielding beliefs of a defined head center.
But it’s not just about identifying the challenges. Nicole offers actionable advice, transformative questions, and insights that aim to shift your perspective and behavior. The essence is moving beyond just ‘knowing’ to truly ‘doing’.
As she shares her own journey and experiences with clients, Nicole’s insights will give you a path to breaking free from the patterns of self sabotage. Dive into this episode and discover the tools to build an unshakeable foundation, both in business and life.
Watch the free masterclass, Unleash Your X-Factor: How To Leverage Your Human Design Profile so that you can own your superpowers, stand out in your niche and consistently attract perfect-fit clients, opportunities and partnerships when you finally begin to embody your Human Design.
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Hi! Welcome to Unshakeable with Human Design, everybody. I’m your host, Nicole Laino. We’re here with a solo episode today. And we are going to be talking about self sabotage. This is a particular behavior that I want to call out about self sabotage, because if you’ve ever experienced it, and if you’re into achieving anything, then you have experienced self sabotage because it’s ultimately what keeps us from that next level.
So, unless you’ve had smooth sailing your entire life, where everything that you’ve ever gone for has been easy and you haven’t had to overcome anything, and you’ve never had to overcome yourself, first of all, congratulations for that. But if that hasn’t been your truth, then you’ve dealt with self sabotage.
And the way that we level up is to overcome ourselves. So, one of the keys to leveling up, and achieving new levels, and achieving peak performance for ourselves, reaching our full potential. One of the keys for that is recognizing where are we on autopilot?
Now, I did an episode a few weeks ago where I talked about examining your beliefs at every level. So this episode pairs really well with that and I’m kind of in a season of this with myself because I’m striving for a new level in my business and whatever I’m going through, I tend to have my clients going through the same thing.
So as I go through the journey and I’m working through it, I can help them work through it better. So it’s always this beautiful process. Now, what I’m calling out today is a particular behavior, a way of being that gets in the way. And I’m going to call out the human design element that I see play the biggest role with this.
And it happens on both the undefined and the defined side. It just happens to be different the way that they show up. So, I want to dive into this because this has made a huge difference in my business and my life. What I’ve been able to achieve, because the name of the game of achievement is being able to stay in the game.
A pitcher in baseball, if they’ve got bases loaded and the best hitter on the opposing team is coming up to bat, it matters the most how grounded they are and how they can get their mind back in the game so their body can follow. If they get shook by that high pressure situation, if they can’t handle it, Then they blow the game.
They blow it for themselves and they blow it for the whole team. We do the same thing. Can you stay in the game when stuff gets tough, when the pressure is on, when things aren’t going your way? Cause that is ultimately how you gain momentum, how when things are working and working and working that you don’t need to tap out because you’re tired. And when things get difficult, you’re not running away or self sabotaging.
So this is one of the things that has come up with me and my clients and I wanted to bring it to you here. First of all, if you are interested in diving into your human design further, I encourage you to take our Profiles Masterclass. This ties in with everything that I do with human design.
Understanding your profile lines has so many implications on your business, on your life. On your relationships, on how you show up, the way that you make money, the way that you save money, all of these things can be found in your profile line. And we touch on that in Finding Your X Factor, my online masterclass.
It’s totally free. If you DM me on Instagram, I’m @NicoleLainoOfficial. DM me the word profiles. And there’ll be a bot that sends you the link to that. You can also go to my website for that. You go to the show notes and we will link that up for you as well.
So let’s dive into self sabotage and the human design element in self sabotage. First of all, I want to just lay out this question for you. I want to ask you, what do you know but aren’t doing? What knowledge are you taking for granted so much that you hear it from somebody like me on a podcast, or you see it on Instagram, or you see somebody who’s successful, who’s telling you that this is something that they did to get them to where they are, and you go, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know that.
Or, oh, that’s so inspiring, and you share it, but you don’t actually do the thing that they suggest you do. You don’t actually take the advice. You don’t put the advice into action. And then you move on to the next thing. This is the sneakiest form of self sabotage, is saying, I already know that.
Yep, I know it. Oh, I know that. It’s not that interesting to me. Now, this happens with so many people, and it happens for different reasons based on the definition in one particular aspect in their human design. And this shows up through the way that you show up in your business, and the way that you show up with the work that you do.
If you are bypassing all the things that you know, and you are not implementing them, then I’ve got news for you. It’s why you’re stuck. It’s why you’re stuck. It’s why you haven’t reached that next level, because you’re looking for something new and the truth is that it’s very simple fundamentals a lot of times that we have to keep coming back to, to reach that new level because you know what, maybe you’ve done something before but you didn’t do it like you are now, the version of you you are today did not do that thing, did not do that simple thing.
Maybe you gave it up. Maybe you stopped doing something. Maybe you stopped doing gratitude journaling. You stopped doing that because you’re like, I don’t need to do that anymore. I did that for a while. It worked great I’m here. Now, next. Who can teach me something new where can I learn something new?
And this is where that coaching addiction, that program addiction comes from. And Human design, what it teaches us to do, is bring that back to our authority, where we are not running around out of lack and instead we’re able to stand our ground in our wholeness and say, is this really what I need right now?
Is this really what I need right now or am I already resourced in that way? These are questions we don’t often ask ourselves. And it requires us to be centered, to really be able to ask those questions and get a true answer. And not an answer from the most conditioned and wounded parts of us.
And the way that this can show up is things like, I see this all the time. Instead of experimenting and using their human design, people are running around trying to figure out what Gate 53 and their conscious moon means. And frankly, while that can be very interesting, and it can be eye opening, and that can be a really impactful thing to know once you’re in Your journey and you’re using your human design.
It actually has no impact on you if you’re not living the design. If you aren’t following the basic fundamentals of human design. So I see this all the time, where people, when I when I talk to them, like, yeah I know that, I know that, but I want to know what this means. Can you tell me what my perspective is?
Can you tell me why it says power here? Can you tell me why it says trajectory novice on my human design chart? I can tell you. But if you’re not using the other aspects of your human design, if you aren’t practicing the fundamentals and experimenting with it, then it will be useless to you.
And that is how the head center works. Now, I see this with, head center being open, and I see this with the head center being defined. It just shows up differently, and I’ll explain to you why. So the head center being open is always thinking about things that don’t matter. It is always looking for something new.
It is always wanting to be inspired. It’s always looking for inspiration. And it’s having its head turned by everything out there. Shiny Object Syndrome comes from the open head center. It can feel like what’s new, what’s new, what’s new, what’s the new thing. It wants to find new ways. Now, if you have the head and the ajna open both, then you’re really gonna feel this.
I have this. And this is why this has been so impactful for me. That’s part of the reason why I’ve been able to drop in much, much deeper. The more I remind myself of this, the more I say, what do I know but I’m not doing? How am I already resourced in this? I ask those questions.
I get really good answers. I spend less money. I get real results. I feel more successful. I feel more confident. It’s a good thing.
Now if you have your head center defined, what we have is, can be stubborn, can be bullheaded. Oh yeah, I know that. I know that. I know that. Nothing new. It can be very fixed in its way of thinking.
So it cannot hear the advice of go do this thing. It hears it and it doesn’t actually let it penetrate. Cause it’s almost like it’s not its idea. Or it doesn’t fit with the mold of the way that person thinks. They’re rejecting the thoughts right away. And so these show up differently.
One is having its head turned by every new thing and saying, I want to know something new. Who cares about doing it? This is how we stay and get trapped in our head. And then the defined head center is saying, I already know it all. I know that. I know that. I know that. And they’re not acting on it because the knowing is so stuck in the way that you know it, that you don’t actually go out and try anything new.
You can get really stuck in beliefs with a defined head center. It’s a fixed mind. It is a fixed form of inspiration. It’s a fixed form of thinking. So, there’s challenges with both. And if you have the head center defined, then the pressure is going to come from you. You’re going to put a lot of pressure on yourself to figure things out.
And you tune out the outside world. And you’re not listening. And you’re not taking advice. And you’re not really letting things penetrate.
So, I want to keep these episodes short. I hope that this was helpful to you. And you see how asking yourself this very simple question, What do I know, but I’m not doing right now?
How can you take that question, take it to heart, whether you have your head center defined, you know what you’re doing, you want to let that penetrate. And if you have it open, you want to really allow it to ground you in something, so you’re not looking for the next thing.
How can you use that question to move yourself forward today? How can you put something into action that you know, rather than just letting the knowing be everything? Okay?
I hope you found this helpful. If you loved it, please let me know. If you want to dive deeper into your profile, please DM me the word profiles on Instagram and we’ll send you the link for that profiles masterclass.
It’s completely free and it’s totally awesome and I hope that you do it. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much for making it all the way to the end of this episode and supporting the show. We appreciate you. So remember, if you want to have an unshakeable business, first you must become an unshakeable human.
So thanks for letting us help you on your journey of becoming Unshakeable with Human Design, everybody. We’ll see you next time.